this space created since i was 16 till the age of 23.

i'm leaving, putting back all those tears and moments in my life.

important people who had been mentioned will always be remembered.

some of those.. grandma, ex.

they took up 21 years of my life, people who i will always love and miss deep inside this corner of my heart.

this is a space where only the hard truth exist.

nothing here is a lie, but a development of how i've grown in blogging through the many years with very much of emotions involved.

moving on for those who has been following me:-

www.paramorphosis.wordpress.com

goodbye.

拍.卖

i would say this long weekend was great, to allow myself to 'get in touch' with my feelings. somehow, it has been left untouch for quite sometime. of course, with <<拍.卖>>

i know i'm slow. i didn't had time to watch. recently, my pace have managed to settle down (less parties, less entertainments, more homely hours) partly i'm still recovering from my cough; managing my busy schedules better.

finally, more time for me to chase a drama from 8pm till 5am the next morning (this doesnt always happen).

i've repeated it 3, 4 times.. till the weekend gonna come to an end. to keep feeling, and thinking about the many things in life. of course, to get myself mesmerize by the beauty of Jesseca Liu in this show.

true love needs nothing, but only a true heart which will bring you towards the many years ahead till death.

i'm gonna be good, be back to who i was; to be who i really am. i've realized, i haven't been doing fulfilling work for sometime, i.e. helping elderly, or being a volunteer; the last time was probably during ASc.

i ought to start soon; hopefully with chance and time.. (this was pretty much inspired by Jesseca Liu's blog). if i'm not wrong, one of my aunt is Elvin Ng's friend.. and from her blog, i found his, then i found hers. oh well, seems like i'm 2-3 relation away to know her!

whoo. she's a very much earthy artist, from her post in her blog. one day, i'll get hold of that special some one (hopefully, someone like her.. ^.^), for many years of undying passion, and moments.

well, these few days.. i've realized who i haven't been... haven't been very earthy. the one who loves trekking, getting in touch with the nature and the many others around the world who are the less fortunate. whatever that are the finer/materialistic things in life.. doesn't bring any meaning.

yes, be contented. count your blessings. those who hadn't appreciate you, no longer need any of your reminsces. with this, i shall leave this blog.. till i found the right title for my next blog, i will be starting on tumblr or wordpress. and my next trip.. i feel like going langkawii, vietnam, cambodia. LOL!

this OST.. probably most people have heard it, it didn't appeal to me with all the promos.. but with the show.. it blends with many feelings.



someday, i will watch that special someone cry.. and i'll sweep off those tears on her beautiful face..

give her a hug, and a kiss.. with love.

i'll save my next gentle kisses for that special someone - someday.

dreams.

it seems like those dreams keep replaying those things that was undone.

since the day you left me hanging.

sometimes, you wish life could be simple like what it used to be.

anyway, 'hello stranger' is a nice movie. depicts simplicity in love.

maybe in a society, where people are less exposed to temptations have some kind of reminsces for people. they value and cherish people more i guess.

anyway, the following MV reminds me of the days..

i pillioned you on my 'bike',

those laughs and walk we had,

the times we carry our lanterns in the chinese garden,

the times we took photos of our shadows,

weird isn't it?

how things happened, and how it ended today.

anyway, rest in peace my cousin-in-law; Daniel, passed on aged 35 due to cancer.

god, bless my 3 nephews and my cousin.

smile.

looking back...

those smiles i know of back then, carry much innocence and simplicity.


those smiles i see today, much different. it feels as if a hardening sense to emotions, to push oneself to move on. probably, a perfect stranger.

A was telling me that he couldn't have tried to be friends anymore, despite 7 months.

Then I thought, perhaps.. it goes the same as for me too. 6 years have been horribly too long to forget anything, everything.

"we couldn't have been friends. when i see you, it will bring me back the many feelings, flashbacks of the many first time, how we had grew up together and the many magical moments. however, if you ever need me, someday; let me know, i will be there like how i've always been."

"i will always remember the walks; on the very night, from Tampines.. through the fly over and all the way to your home. the days where mash potatoes from KFC never seems bored. the time i held onto the umbrella, and you were walking close together with me in the Zoo, in the rain. thereafter, it was our first time together at chomp chomp and packed supper home for family members."

"Remember his laugh -- no matter what it was about -- made you laugh too. Remember when he entered a room you immediately felt butterflies. You remember spending hours on the phone talking about the dream you both had for the future. You even remember how he smells in addition to the soft kisses on your forehead."



p.s. i bet you didn't know the one you're with today is someone my niece knew, probably some relation to my extended family. shocking? or disgusted?

wake up.

remember that very day, i woke up and to realize that everything in this world today changed.

one of my blood brother got ditched. he poured his sorrows to me, 7 months.

i fully feel how he feels.

i had a r/s for almost 6 years, spending most of my time with the family.

the one who probably ditched you ain't just about it that's all.

i know i'm repeating myself, but yeah. it was those kinship, the love that were all built over the many years, through time.

what causes the change?

today, i'm moving forward; 2 x times the speed, the one probably you're with today.

maybe if you could have waited, everything would turn out right?

maybe, maybe not.

timing, is love about timing? or faith? or perseverance?

i was talking to Ms T;

about all those pillow fights..

those wrestling on bed in the early morning..

i talked to A, my depressed fella and he mentioned;

those paths.. those many first time.. those places..

7 years of r/s be it couple, be it as friends..

snapped.. and they were gone..

1 and a half years of perfect stranger.

define pity?

you've died, some years back - changed.

2 years back was when i finished my BSLC at Pasir Lebar 14th Feb 2009; v'Day, and we were at airport. remember? i gave you my red crystal heart.