Oh well, exams are over and recently I had a class chalet. It was wonderful and enjoyable.

Pre-chalet mood was uncertainty which I experienced. I tell myself, it’s not going to be screwed this time. I went off early to meet SH for check in. Thanks a lot to him to make my class chalet a success. So like superman, I flew to pass Stingray to PS, drew money from my bank which belongs to the class and met did the check in plus inventory check. After meeting up with the rest, we checked in. I guess the first impression of the chalet was good. No doubt the place is cozy, comfortable and relaxing.

It was convenient for many too. I guess that was one reason why WL came for 2 nights. Glad. At least there are people making the effort. ZW too, I can sense that uncertainty and boredom in him initially. However, I guess he had mixed with us well w/o his usual buddies. Due to work, some check in late, so yeah… many of the food stuff and BBQin’ I got to look over, and I didn’t know where to find the stuff. Great that WL was there to aid me.

For 3 days, I guess many of us really relax. Not much house keeping this time, except that BBQ kind of make things messy and ME smelly. It took me don’t know how many bath to get rid of the BBQ smell on my hair and body on the next day. Zzz. Lucky with the aid of sauna, steam bathe, the smell kind of got rid… Then, had a game of soccer while some go Zzz… I didn’t know I still can have stamina to run and chase ball. I guess it’s just all in the mind. LOL. Shah didn’t played well though, we was irritated by the grassy. For me, nothing much until later when I sat on it and my butt felt a little itchy…

Dinner at pizza hut was a great one. LOL. We split into groups to have our meals. Hot and chessy. Then on the last night, I had majong till 3 am. After that I went off to the room to sleep and Shah was coming up with all the GAYS and dirty talks. So I guess the class should know who the real gay is now. LOL.

Out of 20 of us, 17 gave a chance and made this chalet an enjoyable and successful one. Oh, though Mega-Flame burns the throat and it also burned (bonded) the 17 of us together. Though not very bonded, it was better now. Keep up, and let’s move on AD24. Hopefully, we can have 1 more chalet yea. ARANDA again!!! I simply love the place. Any other better place?

First of all, Happy Teachers’ Day to all Teachers who have once taught me or who have shaped my life one way or another.

Today is Teachers’ Day eve, went back to PRCS today with my old pals. Miss being with them though and we even went to Party World for Kara! It has been a long time since we last hang out.

Would like to comment that the color combination of PRCS building seriously zZz. The gate seems like temple’s gate. RED COLOR. Special huh? Why? Ask the Principal. First, I met up with the OM Singh and Department of Head of PE San NOT Shan. Had my lunch with them on the table n chatted. Since I’m an ex-school student, speaking to them is so much carefree than before. After that, Razak came.

LOL. San n Singh was asking SM to get married early better. Razak says, “Alex, don’t listen to them, enjoy first. You can always adopt one.” 3 Generation types of people were present there. So just like the 9 pm show; Big Man, Small Man. Finally after 2 years, I manage to taste the food in school. Taste and feeling never change.

Once again, I inspected the room I love most in school, NCC Room. It was messy as expected. Before I left, it was comparable to Azhar’s NPCC room, though theirs was much cozier, but in terms of tidiness it was reasonably comparable.

After lunch I bulged into the staff room without calling up the teachers (while Joseph & company waited outside). I had a long chat with YYH. He was a wise man. Seriously wise. Maybe due to literature, the study of humanity, I’ve learnt to observed and understand people better than before. Last time, when he use to ‘suan’ me, I was affected of course. But I am a serious man who can’t take joke unlike now; skin thicker. Ha.

So how was life? Hectic, competitive, tiring. “Don’t have to bother how well people do, as long as you do your best and you have no regrets, it’s alright” “You’re hardworking; I believe you can do it.” Encouraging words which some how recharged the energy I’ve lost after a long time. No one does this in TP or ever since I left PRCS. I was touch at that moment. Thanks Mr Yeo.

After that, met up with Ms Chua, Luo Lao Shi, Mimi Lam…

Then the funniest man came into action; Mr Collin with his lame moves and cold jokes. More white hair, aged. I remember those times when he ran with us, giving us extra Maths lessons when we’re just Secondary 1 & 2, always “remedial time is 2.30 pm and till depends”. It's always until 6 anyway. The vain spot is there combing his hair, showing black face. I’m always scolded for being selfish, who just ran to the water cooler and take a sip after run which I wasn’t suppose to do so; Endurance, Determination, One for All, All for One. That’s the rules you play.

Mr Collin is a great teacher. He even wanted to pass me some exam papers for Science after I mentioned that I’m giving tuition to students. He too encouraged me; work harder and study hard! Without him, there wouldn’t be the Alex today here. He would be just as selfish and a guy who never learns. Chance. People need a chance. He gave me a chance to prove myself, a chance to change. Thanks to Singh and San too, otherwise I would have a Beta record now in my report book.

Then, changes took place during Secondary 3! That was 1 reason I wasn’t a counselor but a USM of PRCS only then. Anyway, the current Acting USM was the boy who I gave the “Best Cadet” award to when he was just Secondary One. He still remembers my name! I can sense from his eyes is full of respect! Ha, I’m afraid not up to it for my status now. So he asked me how to manage a unit and how to pull up the unit to Gold back. Then, tips were exchanged. Sad to say, after I left they dropped to Silver.

Then, tips are; be firm, mature, cool and steady, and train harder!

So I was talking about signing on Army and getting a degree during the sign on days with Mr Yeo. At least, during the 5 years I’ve income and pursuing a degree. Probably after 5 years, having a degree would help me get better jobs in the industry. He said “I see you to be potentially SAF last time leh, now I don’t think so!” LOL. What have I become? Potential for… Celebrity? Modeling? Okay, humble now. Shouldn’t be BHB.

I’m still thinking of ways to earn fast money though. I want a better life for my family.

So many teachers were still shock to know that Me and Diana were still together. They thought it was puppy love. Sad to say, I was much more matured than lah! That’s why it can preserver until now! Even Mdm Kamisah agreed! The rest of the praises given by her, I shan’t mention it. Haha…

All right. I’m motivated now! Studies aside for now. Gym harder!

Thanks to all Teachers. Cheers!

“Election is round the corner, vote for me.” This can be commonly seen in the whole of TP. Yes, many are running election; for studies club or TPSU.

“Hey Alex, you’re not running?”
“Nope.”

Sad huh? Or disappointment to those who wanted to support me, but can’t? Sorry pals, sorry people, sorry my friends. I have my reasons.

Hence, the latest news – 17 people are running for ASc main committee. However, some bias lecturers publicize for 13. Here’s the break down. Out of the 13, there are people who are non-subcommittee members. The other 4, 1 or 2 was sub-committee members. Obviously, it’s favoritism or biasness if you want to put it. UGLY. Extreme ugliness done by the lecturers.

It’s not like the 1 in the 4 is a slacker or what. He/She did her work, made her contribution to ASc before. He/She did the things as were instructed. How ugly can politics be even demonstrated in school? Ugly lecturers. Ugly CF.

There’s a story, this is how it goes…

A: “Hey, why you don’t want to run.”
B: “Why should I? Look at the other runners and the person who is going to press the horn.”

A stunned; turning into stunner. B continues…

B: “Fuck up KELONG horny horners.”
A: “Why?” (Disbelief)

B: “If I start a little earlier, he would say I foul. But if the others start a little earlier, they would definitely run ahead of me. Some of the spectators out there should come down the track and run. They have more stamina which you’ll never know and never discover. This is because Fuck up KELONG horny horners, don’t like spectators.”

A: “But, why did you say Fuck up KELONG horny horners, don’t like spectators???”

B: “Only runners are interested in the sport. However for spectators, no matter how many time he horns, they never run and never move.”

Moral of the story: Fuck up KELONG horny horners’ horn irritates the spectators.

Hence, they’ll never want to be on the track. They’ll never want to be controlled. The horn had made the spectators lose interest. It's not the person, but the act itself.

Bad metaphor isn’t it? I crapped it up. Read between the lines, use your reading skills.

I once said, a leader is never nor considered a good leader if he shows biasness nor favoritism regardless of how much you can lead. He gives everyone the opportunity to perform and rectify the problem if his comrades fail to perform. More often than not, the problem lies with him/her - the leader.

Catfish, got it? It goes the same for lecturers.

It’s the failure to lead in proper. Something has brewed in the tea; the tea leaves. Then, the tea is drinkable. Some leaves separates from the other leaves when the drinker starts pouring. You broke the club with your actions and “take it for granted” attitude.

You have the brain. But when brain comes without a heart, the brain becomes much useless after all.

I miss those inspiring teachers in secondary school. Thanks lots to my NCOs, I learnt a lot.

Many things are bothering me; politics. Not in Singapore but ASc. I'm still considering. Many external factors are obstructing my way. To go for? Or don't? Perhaps, I've to wait for the outcome of interest for my Canoe Polo.

Past few nights, talked to RP. I miss NCC indeed. Back to Week 0, I was narrating to RP how I would have done, if I've still got my RANK and POST. It was the attitude freshman that SHA referred me to.

Back during school days, my Officers has no worries for disciplinary or AP students. I had always handled them. Scold? Yes, I did. I even shouted right at their face. Of course, this doesn’t help. I've always played devil-angel. I'll counsel them for their mistake. However, as LT head in a polytechnic; things are beyond my reach. For, people will hate me. Hence, I refer AP students to lecturers.

I decided not to sign on as CLT is partly because I would like to expose myself to other forms of leadership. I did. I learned a lot of interpersonal skills after O levels. However, I’ve learned that as a leader, you can’t expect everyone to like you. But, you need the majority to like you. Otherwise, the problem lies with you.

I’ve always got some things to say. However, sometimes I’m too tired to blog. Just like Saturday night, I’ve plenty to blog. Then now, I’ve forgotten what I want to say.

All right. A new week is starting again. I’m going to be shag by the days. God bless me. Good night.

All right. Due to popular demand, (true or not i don't know) my blog will be back to life soon. Cheers! Await for my updates!

I've been too lazy to blog. Hence for the time being, please enjoy my GC journal.

PRE– TRIP JOURNAL

10 December 2005, Saturday
It was the first global citizenship briefing. It was uncertainty which I experienced. I received an email a few days ago and was told to be in the reserves. I’ve never taken a flight before. I hope this would be an opportunity for me to see the world out of Singapore.

One of my friends didn’t attend the briefing as he thought that the chances for him to get in the subject would be low. However, I think that if you want something and go all out, you’ll get what you want eventually.

Beautiful pictures were shown in the briefing. The world is big out there but I’ve yet to seen any. A shanghainese woman was invited to provide us with more information and lifestyle of Shanghai – interesting. I guess many who attended the briefing had fun pronouncing some of the shanghainese phrases.

I’ve also realized from what I’ve learnt in sociology, I was able to apply this concept - cultures and values are embedded in our language. Without language, it wouldn’t create the environment you are living in, and the values you’re taught ever since you’re born. Then, it’s where you’re born that’s important. Environment and people shaped our life.

There’s still hope though. I hope I’ll be able to go Shanghai.

7 March 2006, Monday
It was the first day of global citizenship lesson. I’ve got into the class of TV01. Ms Marie had lots of proverbs which sets me to think deeper. There’s so many citizenship that I’ve come to realize, global; student, employer, employee and tourist. They come under one big umbrella - citizenship.

Globalization is the compression and intensification of the consequences of the world as a whole.

The world has become smaller each day with the rapid growth of technologies. Good or bad? Perhaps I would prefer the world to continue to be in its primitive state. Why? Good phrase to quote, “When the world is big, we think small. But as it gets smaller, we think big.”

There are so many problems in the world now. Environment verses Human, Human verses Human. For the recent years, many things had happened. It started out with mouth and food disease, SARS, Bird Flu; evolving from one stage to another, Tsunami and etc. And we human tried our best to overcome them and restore them to what it was in their original state. Coming to human verses human; terrorism around the globe and genocides happening in other countries.

Is it a hint that we should restore Earth to what it was supposed to be?

Human life has improved over the centuries due to the wonderful brains we had. At the same time, it has brought us various consequences. In many ways we had benefited (an easier life). However, from what we have done and received over the years, was it human’s retribution?

Maybe if we’ve learnt to be more self-contented rather than trying to pursue knowledge and understand why, the Earth would be able to survive longer, humans would be happier and live longer. However, pros and cons emerged as we get more and more educated. Imagine, I wouldn’t be typing this entry. Back to primitive, I may be learning how to hunt now.

7 March 2006, Tuesday
Today’s presentation was impressively done by my classmates. I could have done better, but maybe I’ve yet use to the people in my class. There was lots of “arguments” in defending individual perceptions.

Though I have my point of view, I wasn’t spontaneous enough. While the arguments were going on, thoughts are running in my mind, analyzing others perception. I wasn’t confident enough in a new group of people to speak up.

Our thoughts, is it regarded as perception or deception? What is right and wrong? If murdering and taking one’s life is wrong, it’s because we have the mind to judge. What about taking the life of an animal? Do we have the mind to judge? Yes. But because an animal doesn’t have a mind to judge, humans aren’t blame.

Right and wrong isn’t defined. If there’s a day whereby we’ve to be cannibals, I guess many will be; in the mental state of desperate survival. If you say you wouldn’t, you’ll be killed. Naturally, you’ll sleep well and sleep forever. There’ll be neither have fear nor guilt.

True enough, human tries to maximize profit over all values. Due to environmental and social problems, we can be extremely selfish.

“World federation is an ideal that will not die. More and more people are coming to realize that peace must be more than interlude if we are to survive; that people is a produce of law and order; that law is essential if the force arms do not rule the world.” -William O. Douglas, US Supreme Court Justice

To simplify this proverb – the world is perfect, peace is important if we want to survive; hence if we can produce law and order, peace should be made without resorting to violence.

It then leads to peace lying in the mindset of man. We chose our path in life; we’re responsible for what we’ve chosen. Selfishness leads to anger and frustration and then leading to war. It starts off as initial state of selfishness, to the process of anger; war had already started in the process before actions actually took place.
Therefore, for this proverb, “The primacy of profit maximization over all other values is the core of environmental and social problems.” I do only agree partly.

I do not agree that environmental and social problems are the core that we go against our values. Rather the core problem lies in us. As what I’ve learnt recently, the “moral compass”. We can choose to go against or not to.

Tired… Tired from school and projects. Had an argument with SH and WL due to project meeting. SH argued for WL.

To get you prepared and clear your school work these few days and come to meet on Sunday means a lot to her. I understand. Can you tell me a reason for me to accept? Spend time with family. I quitted DB to do so. However, I burnt it for projects.

Just a week and it’s that difficult? After ALP on Saturday, I bet many do not want to do any work. A Sunday can mean a lot to you, so does it to the others.

I understand you have activity but tell me what is it that you should be allowed to be excuse.

“You do not need to go to such an extent. What’s the big deal?” What a statement. The deal is not very big. It’s all for the sake of the group - to be more mentally prepared and rather being “gan chiong”.

TR calls for meeting on Sunday. His group members grumble. He so called argued with G too. Why not SH argue for G?

In the end, he ends up preparing his presentation at 02 00 to 02 30 hours.

Recalling the scene, I do not like it at all. Why do you have to argue in such a way whereby I’m trying to explain it?

I do not want perfection. I seek perfection to improve, not to be perfect. It pushes you up higher than the others. Though it’s not perfect, we can see the work produced is better. Though it’s comparative, it just the matter on how you go about treating it.

Presentation is not about individual. It’s the ability of your group to impress others. Naturally, all the group members will score. Organization’s objective above one’s self. My objective is to do well as a whole. The satisfaction is better.

Why can’t people understand? I’m someone who makes decision. I chose what’s best to what I can think of. At the same time, I’m free for ideas. Convince me, do not just keep quiet. Or rather, discuss it to make it better.

If everyone does not give slip short or half past six work, it would make life of the collaborator easier. Still I’m looking for a better template.

Working in a group, does not mean when you come for meeting, you’re co-operating. I’ve realize the definition of co-operation. It’s to give in your best to the organization (no slip short work) and take the initiative to ask if the other need help or to do something for others.

All these goes with you till you’re at work or no matter where you go. Perfectionist is needed in a group to produce better work; it also pushes to group as a whole to go further. Am I such a difficult person to work with?

In the end, she can’t make still though I’ve compromised to her needs. Tomorrow morning. Reason: My BF isn’t that happy. I accepted.

I don’t trust school’s computer, it is I do not want to do it in school. The internet is slow too. Want to have a trial of the presentation and practice it as a team also kind of inconvenient.

I’ve done my best.