HATE.
i hate people who bullshit about perspectives.
i do hate people doing things behind my back. who doesn't?
but my tummy can be very big in eating bullets.
looking at a different perspective, putting my emotions in their shoes, be self-less.
drop all assumptions & expectations.
show a little more understanding and acceptance.
like what i told my man today?
i seem to manage work issues and r/s fairly well and gave 100% understanding and acceptance. but why not love? it's because i'm more rational and logical when it boils down to work? because i see work as a challenge/problem to solve and not something personal?
for the next few paragraphs, i regard it as an emotional perspective.
vent vent...
no doubt i hate this feeling every now and then. but each time, i find reasons for love, to defend, to give myself more breathing space.
people who doesn't know me well probably thinks that i'm always, or look confident. confidence? i don't have it all the time. i have my fears to a certain extend, and i believe everyone has that, but they don't voice it?
everytime, i feel being hammer down by comments or as what i see. i push myself up again, and to carry on what i hope i could achieve or make it at the end.
in different aspect, being selfish, we feel we did a lot, our expectations grew further, we start to feel unappreciated and to some point, taken for granted.
at one perspective, we may see ONLY what he/she has done, but the other party may not see it and vice versa. we think that it's ONLY what, then... what happens if he/she could do it prolong despite time out of his/her heart or passion?
and i hate those whom try to influence or should it in proper terms; "bullshit perspective", where they themselves actually failed many times without actually working on it, or at least as they claim they believe.
making themselves cheap in their self proclaim values.
sorry that i'm so.. crude.
just... venting.
at least i'm being truthful here. unlike the way people try to put across in hidden feelings.
am i too frank in this post?
100% no reservation.
sorry if i made anyone feel guilty conscious. it's not for you to feel that way, but to reflect.
don't take my honesty/truthfulness for granted as well, cause i believe no one has that courage.
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"a moment of truth" as i watched recently, an U.S game show. For 500K, will you reveal the truth about your thoughts/dirty/kinky/ sorry things you did before behind your wife's back or your unrevealed past which you think you shouldn't have said and just get married?
simple as it seems, but contestant struggles to speak.
this would probably make your r/s or your family flip totally! and the detector is just in your hands, analyzing you.
so you see married man whom they did the many sad and sorry things behind their wife's back.
yet, years back... "oh, i was so madly deeply in love with him... he's so truthful... i'm gonna marry him!" CHOP! you're so cheated.
"my lies passed with distinction." =.=.. man are bastards isn't it? but that's what probably made women love them more?
ironic. when you're in here, you feel this way. when you're out, you feel the other.
hence, know where your contentment lies clearly.
for money or for love?
to sustain love, you hide, you chose to keep.
for money, you chose to make the love you sustain, cry or even tear.
why can't people be truthful at the start?
any reasons for the choice you made?
r/s when it hit about an average of 7 years, it means boredom to people.
it's also termed "the 7-year itch". & a man could sustain his passion for someone he love, 3-4 years. hence, i guess not many man could actually love a person that long?
till now, i'm still ask myself why, and why couldn't it be stopped.
i could find a thousand reasons why i hate you. yet, i couldn't find any reason in loving you. is that why?
damn. myself.
