i feel vengeance burning ever since that day, it never stops.
the fire never ceased.
dreams kept haunting you; you start going crazy, making less sense everyday.
you do not know when you will ever get crazy.
i really have all your farking details; if you're ever sorry dude.
i will smash up your hamster face really hard.
i will never forget your, "so?" with that fuck attitude of holding on to my USED item.
yes, my 'handing over' was a golden hand shake.
how gracious.
yes, it's no longer the one i used to love.
fake smile, fake words. soul-mates? bullshit.
the world getting superficial isn't it?
passion?
hope he fucks you badly and fuck others behind your fucking back with all the lies, like what he has done to his ex, for you.
be happy with your fairytale, like you always dream.
happy being 3rd party of others isn't that so?
they all know.
being crude is kindness isn't it?
all that we've ever shared was nothing.
what you shared today with another will turn into NOTHING one day.
happy fucking.
mood:? insane.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
記得
你记得今天是什么日子吗?
从小一起成长的岁月有多纯真, 有多珍贵
认识有一年, 我们是 - 普通朋友
相处了蒋经6年, 我们成了 - 最真心的伴侣
从始至今, 8年了.
时间将经快要1年半了, 我们成了最熟悉的陌生人
沉默...
很痛.
sometimes i wish we could be really the longest couple amongst friends, ever existed.
i wish i could crack up crabs for you to eat,
i wish i could peel the many prawns you like,
i wish those walks in those late nights never end,
i wish i could still pillion you on my bike and enjoy the night breeze,
i wish you could be there like you always do,
i wish i could pick you up, like how i always did. but with something called my own now.
sometimes i wish nothing, no one changes.
if you talk about speed, i'm speeding for you; to be faster in any progression that you ever wished i was.
sometimes songs are like encrypted with memories which you can never delete
你记得今天是什么日子吗?
从小一起成长的岁月有多纯真, 有多珍贵
认识有一年, 我们是 - 普通朋友
相处了蒋经6年, 我们成了 - 最真心的伴侣
从始至今, 8年了.
时间将经快要1年半了, 我们成了最熟悉的陌生人
沉默...
很痛.
sometimes i wish we could be really the longest couple amongst friends, ever existed.
i wish i could crack up crabs for you to eat,
i wish i could peel the many prawns you like,
i wish those walks in those late nights never end,
i wish i could still pillion you on my bike and enjoy the night breeze,
i wish you could be there like you always do,
i wish i could pick you up, like how i always did. but with something called my own now.
sometimes i wish nothing, no one changes.
if you talk about speed, i'm speeding for you; to be faster in any progression that you ever wished i was.
sometimes songs are like encrypted with memories which you can never delete
Saturday, December 25, 2010
last christmas.
i remember years ago, this was the song i gave.
i wonder today if you could recognise me?
sometimes, you wonder how long you will love somebody.
maybe, i stopped loving.
maybe, there are so much sentimental values and meaning towards this; that you keep reminscing it. because you know there's a history that you can never change; something which once felt so real, so true. someone you spent part of your life with, overcoming all the many differences/hurdles to become one.
last year i spent this time in Thailand; with sorrows filled in my heart, hoping i could find the way back home.
this year, it has been less sorrowful.
recently, the show 'breakout' though it has been quite fictitious. however, i guess it depicts the extremes of every individual character in reality.
maybe those who live in their own world, have a much simpler perceptions in life. perhaps, sometimes it does get quite complicated when you know memories haunt you day and night.
and maybe we do really have thoughts of ending our life one time or another; and we just carry on to see what life would bring us.
you don't reminsce anything don't you? it hadn't meant anything?
what have i done wrong? i wasn't any bastards who lied to you before.
once bitten and twice shy
i keep my distance but you still catch my eye
tell me baby do you recognise me?
well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me
merry x'mas
i remember years ago, this was the song i gave.
i wonder today if you could recognise me?
sometimes, you wonder how long you will love somebody.
maybe, i stopped loving.
maybe, there are so much sentimental values and meaning towards this; that you keep reminscing it. because you know there's a history that you can never change; something which once felt so real, so true. someone you spent part of your life with, overcoming all the many differences/hurdles to become one.
last year i spent this time in Thailand; with sorrows filled in my heart, hoping i could find the way back home.
this year, it has been less sorrowful.
recently, the show 'breakout' though it has been quite fictitious. however, i guess it depicts the extremes of every individual character in reality.
maybe those who live in their own world, have a much simpler perceptions in life. perhaps, sometimes it does get quite complicated when you know memories haunt you day and night.
and maybe we do really have thoughts of ending our life one time or another; and we just carry on to see what life would bring us.
you don't reminsce anything don't you? it hadn't meant anything?
what have i done wrong? i wasn't any bastards who lied to you before.
once bitten and twice shy
i keep my distance but you still catch my eye
tell me baby do you recognise me?
well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me
merry x'mas
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
6.10AM
I was holding onto you & you told me everything; to stop trying so hard, seeing me tired makes you ache, because you told me how much you do love me and you would walk with me despite anything.
Those familiar family members, told us to cherish each other.
my heart trembles with ache, breathing gets harder in reality.
on the verge of tears as I've seen myself.
the touch felt so real, so familiar.
my mobile rang, and I'm back.
I felt like shit, but I enjoyed the dream.
Ironic.
sometimes I wish I die in there and never wake up.
maybe one day, someday.
sometimes I feel like I've lost surrealness in reality.
sometimes I feel I've stopped making any sense.
sometimes I feel I've been suffering from split personality.
maybe, it has been so long.
it makes people crazy when it haunts you day & night.
someday, I would die remembering everything.
rest in peace, my love.
this song; for the perfect you, in that dream i had all about you.
maybe today, i would have proposed to you.
maybe all those perfect dreams we've built through time, will be realize.
if love could walk through time, this love would have been really beautiful.
I was holding onto you & you told me everything; to stop trying so hard, seeing me tired makes you ache, because you told me how much you do love me and you would walk with me despite anything.
Those familiar family members, told us to cherish each other.
my heart trembles with ache, breathing gets harder in reality.
on the verge of tears as I've seen myself.
the touch felt so real, so familiar.
my mobile rang, and I'm back.
I felt like shit, but I enjoyed the dream.
Ironic.
sometimes I wish I die in there and never wake up.
maybe one day, someday.
sometimes I feel like I've lost surrealness in reality.
sometimes I feel I've stopped making any sense.
sometimes I feel I've been suffering from split personality.
maybe, it has been so long.
it makes people crazy when it haunts you day & night.
someday, I would die remembering everything.
rest in peace, my love.
this song; for the perfect you, in that dream i had all about you.
maybe today, i would have proposed to you.
maybe all those perfect dreams we've built through time, will be realize.
if love could walk through time, this love would have been really beautiful.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Sunday, December 05, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Love Language
came across K's blog,
"it's the beginning that is always the hardest."
saw this vid sharing over at our social network, but decided to share it here instead.
love can be simple isn't it?
they do not require fanciful dinning, ambience, no fanciful presents.
in their eyes, there's only the beauty of the other.
came across K's blog,
"it's the beginning that is always the hardest."
saw this vid sharing over at our social network, but decided to share it here instead.
love can be simple isn't it?
they do not require fanciful dinning, ambience, no fanciful presents.
in their eyes, there's only the beauty of the other.
Monday, November 15, 2010
5am
i woke up to my senses, feeling the reality of the world at this time.
my heart raced, carrying that ache deep inside.
it felt like it was dug out from within.
then i know, it was just a dream.
YOU.
these dreams are way beyond my control, frequency ranging from twice to thrice the past 1 year.
sometimes i wish it didn't happened, then those dreams won't keep haunting me.
sometimes when you wish you could control everything, you just couldn't.
i've never thought i'll believe and have so much faith in what love is till that day:-
i remember what you wore on that day.
i remember the silly things that happened, that we both laughed; to realize the wet grass had make our bottoms wet.
i remember how much you didn't wanna hold my hand.
i remember the first time, both of us; trying to flew a kite.
i remember all the pictures, with funny faces we took round the world.
i remember how much i missed you on your birthday; that i couldn't have spend a better time with you, but only to borrow mobile from my sergeant and to asked my whole platoon mates to sing you - a birthday song.
i remember how happy you were; to received 21 roses, with a card sweetly written.
i'll always remember the day; i told you how much i love you, how much i told you to remember the many moments, remember - my love.
true love supersedes everything.
there'll only be forgive and remember - someday.
they say; forgive and forget are self-denial to move on, without true happiness.
with this,
i ended this entry with tears trickled.
(let me be, entries recorded are shitty days.)
i woke up to my senses, feeling the reality of the world at this time.
my heart raced, carrying that ache deep inside.
it felt like it was dug out from within.
then i know, it was just a dream.
YOU.
these dreams are way beyond my control, frequency ranging from twice to thrice the past 1 year.
sometimes i wish it didn't happened, then those dreams won't keep haunting me.
sometimes when you wish you could control everything, you just couldn't.
i've never thought i'll believe and have so much faith in what love is till that day:-
i remember what you wore on that day.
i remember the silly things that happened, that we both laughed; to realize the wet grass had make our bottoms wet.
i remember how much you didn't wanna hold my hand.
i remember the first time, both of us; trying to flew a kite.
i remember all the pictures, with funny faces we took round the world.
i remember how much i missed you on your birthday; that i couldn't have spend a better time with you, but only to borrow mobile from my sergeant and to asked my whole platoon mates to sing you - a birthday song.
i remember how happy you were; to received 21 roses, with a card sweetly written.
i'll always remember the day; i told you how much i love you, how much i told you to remember the many moments, remember - my love.
true love supersedes everything.
there'll only be forgive and remember - someday.
they say; forgive and forget are self-denial to move on, without true happiness.
with this,
i ended this entry with tears trickled.
(let me be, entries recorded are shitty days.)
Saturday, November 13, 2010
10 Years of Love.
It's definitely sweet to see couples getting married after dating for 10 long years.
Since they were secondary schoolmates, they were there for one another.. be it the good and bad, for 10 long years. Sweet?
It is, definitely.
How beautiful is love when it could be tested through time.
"if you realized no one is there for you one day, remember how deeply i once loved you." interesting quote?
haa, i wonder how many people will realize this.
i will never forget the days when you:-
smile when we washed the car
smile when i am folding stars for you
smile when you were a pillion on my bike
smile when we're simply holding our hands
smile when we walked through the endless roads
smile when we squatted down, sweating, just to get your car painted by marker
it will always be the sweat, we dripped that i'll remember.
they were once so real, so innocent, soo honest.
i just couldn't find that feeling.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
a few more weeks and i'll achieve what i could.
where are you, to share my joy and success?
it has been a long 1 year 3 months.
It's definitely sweet to see couples getting married after dating for 10 long years.
Since they were secondary schoolmates, they were there for one another.. be it the good and bad, for 10 long years. Sweet?
It is, definitely.
How beautiful is love when it could be tested through time.
"if you realized no one is there for you one day, remember how deeply i once loved you." interesting quote?
haa, i wonder how many people will realize this.
i will never forget the days when you:-
smile when we washed the car
smile when i am folding stars for you
smile when you were a pillion on my bike
smile when we're simply holding our hands
smile when we walked through the endless roads
smile when we squatted down, sweating, just to get your car painted by marker
it will always be the sweat, we dripped that i'll remember.
they were once so real, so innocent, soo honest.
i just couldn't find that feeling.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
a few more weeks and i'll achieve what i could.
where are you, to share my joy and success?
it has been a long 1 year 3 months.
Sunday, November 07, 2010
fugly world.
it's sad to see how betrayal happens in the night. they got bf, they got gf; so what to them? so, what is the purpose and value of a r/s in the world we're in today?
lies.
nothing or no r/s you have has that great value for you to cherish.
there seems like nothing which you can connect your soul fully to, to trust whole heartedly. for that moment if it seems like a fairytale, then please wake up. they are lies which blinded you at the start.
it's sad to see all the break ups happening over in FB. well, don't be sad. people change, they come and go. no one reminsce anything. they always put the word, "move on" at the top of the mind, at the tip of the mouth.
the world has made us so superfical to the point we no longer understand the word 'cherish' and we all give up easily. the real meaning of a r/s is then lost, over time.
sometimes i wish you will be there like what you use to be, supporting my soul. today, who am i?
it's sad to see how betrayal happens in the night. they got bf, they got gf; so what to them? so, what is the purpose and value of a r/s in the world we're in today?
lies.
nothing or no r/s you have has that great value for you to cherish.
there seems like nothing which you can connect your soul fully to, to trust whole heartedly. for that moment if it seems like a fairytale, then please wake up. they are lies which blinded you at the start.
it's sad to see all the break ups happening over in FB. well, don't be sad. people change, they come and go. no one reminsce anything. they always put the word, "move on" at the top of the mind, at the tip of the mouth.
the world has made us so superfical to the point we no longer understand the word 'cherish' and we all give up easily. the real meaning of a r/s is then lost, over time.
sometimes i wish you will be there like what you use to be, supporting my soul. today, who am i?
water retention
for those who feels they may need to lose fats, please remember; it could be water retention.
they usually accumulate on cheeks (don't think of it as face fats), legs, tight.
reasons being: late nights, stress, too much salt intake (rubbish which you may ate), alcohol which probably malfunctioning your kidney to 'sort out' the salt levels in your body, irregular meals which causes irregular hormones.
whatever it is, you can google it.
take care.
for those who feels they may need to lose fats, please remember; it could be water retention.
they usually accumulate on cheeks (don't think of it as face fats), legs, tight.
reasons being: late nights, stress, too much salt intake (rubbish which you may ate), alcohol which probably malfunctioning your kidney to 'sort out' the salt levels in your body, irregular meals which causes irregular hormones.
whatever it is, you can google it.
take care.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
perfect lies.
from that moment when you thought your lies were perfect, it has crushed everything.
nothing about you was worth value for, just because you didn't value any
form of relationship at the start, much less the honesty & respect of friendship at
the basis.
one day if your heart feels torn apart, remember me; the pain you gave.
this song is for you - from me.
Falling a thousand feet per second, you still take me by surprise
I just know we can't be over, I can see it in your eyes
Making every kind of silence, takes a lot to realize
It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie
And as long as I can feel you holding on
I won't fall, even if you said I was wrong
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
Making every kind of silence, it takes a lot to realize
It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie
And as long as I can feel you holding on
I won't fall, even if you said I wrong
I know that I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
When you're caught in a lie and you've got nothing to hide
When you've got nowhere to run and you've got nothing inside
It tears right through me, you thought that you knew me
You thought that you knew
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my, just myself
Just myself, myself, just myself
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
from that moment when you thought your lies were perfect, it has crushed everything.
nothing about you was worth value for, just because you didn't value any
form of relationship at the start, much less the honesty & respect of friendship at
the basis.
one day if your heart feels torn apart, remember me; the pain you gave.
this song is for you - from me.
Falling a thousand feet per second, you still take me by surprise
I just know we can't be over, I can see it in your eyes
Making every kind of silence, takes a lot to realize
It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie
And as long as I can feel you holding on
I won't fall, even if you said I was wrong
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
Making every kind of silence, it takes a lot to realize
It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie
And as long as I can feel you holding on
I won't fall, even if you said I wrong
I know that I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
When you're caught in a lie and you've got nothing to hide
When you've got nowhere to run and you've got nothing inside
It tears right through me, you thought that you knew me
You thought that you knew
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my personality?
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start
I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave
Was it something I said or just my, just myself
Just myself, myself, just myself
I'm not perfect, but I keep trying
let lyrics speaks for itself, let the song brings out how you feel.
with a beer, the liveband played this song...
and till today, i often woke up with haunted dreams, which makes my heart - ache.
who says the longer it is, the less painful? it's not always the case.
I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like is was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
After all this time
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
And I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me dies when I let you go
with a beer, the liveband played this song...
and till today, i often woke up with haunted dreams, which makes my heart - ache.
who says the longer it is, the less painful? it's not always the case.
I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like is was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
After all this time
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
And I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me dies when I let you go
Thursday, October 21, 2010
why do i always forget the fact that people do change?
the other day was just another fucking emo day.
i kept feeling slow, each day i try to push myself to move faster to achieve my goal.
and you know your success should be in time to come.
let time reveal values, character and beliefs.
sometimes it just happen to me all all the time...
the other day was just another fucking emo day.
i kept feeling slow, each day i try to push myself to move faster to achieve my goal.
and you know your success should be in time to come.
let time reveal values, character and beliefs.
sometimes it just happen to me all all the time...
Monday, October 18, 2010
Thursday, October 07, 2010
想念。童年
the song 稻香 brings back memories no doubt; surprises in the car boot (presents for you), those walks, those rainy days.
at the same time, it makes me feel like a child.
we always wanted to grow up when we were younger, now you hope you can be like a child.
sometimes you may wonder how love happen.
sometimes you ponder how did it end? like why? hur hur.
someone who was once like your soulmate, for many years... you couldn't believe how it could have happen.
have you wonder how everything may end in whatever r/s you have with someone today?
like they said, it felt like someone died. it indeed felt that way.
but imagine how i coould have felt losing so many of the ones i love and love me - overnight, and not just the one and only whom i love most before?
the kind of kinship which you built with the many people over time.
how could people totally understand that?
for love to last, you just gotta keep falling in love over and over again despite time.
how many times have we fallen in love?
twice, in 6 years.
i miss you, the very authentic and real you.
where have you been?
the song 稻香 brings back memories no doubt; surprises in the car boot (presents for you), those walks, those rainy days.
at the same time, it makes me feel like a child.
we always wanted to grow up when we were younger, now you hope you can be like a child.
sometimes you may wonder how love happen.
sometimes you ponder how did it end? like why? hur hur.
someone who was once like your soulmate, for many years... you couldn't believe how it could have happen.
have you wonder how everything may end in whatever r/s you have with someone today?
like they said, it felt like someone died. it indeed felt that way.
but imagine how i coould have felt losing so many of the ones i love and love me - overnight, and not just the one and only whom i love most before?
the kind of kinship which you built with the many people over time.
how could people totally understand that?
for love to last, you just gotta keep falling in love over and over again despite time.
how many times have we fallen in love?
twice, in 6 years.
i miss you, the very authentic and real you.
where have you been?
Monday, October 04, 2010
path
sometimes you wonder about when this road will end
sometimes you wonder when will all these happiness end, one day
i wondered through my most felt blissful times when i was much younger, where i have all the ones who loved me.
how often, how many. cherish what's "love through time"?
how many cherish the many path we've walked, and through the darkest point of our life?
some of us can only mourn for the lost of our love, despite years.
those who tried to forget, never really do.
sometimes you really hope that those who grew up with you, could really be truthful and standby you always.
but, they never really do.
we all thought so.
sometimes you wonder about when this road will end
sometimes you wonder when will all these happiness end, one day
i wondered through my most felt blissful times when i was much younger, where i have all the ones who loved me.
how often, how many. cherish what's "love through time"?
how many cherish the many path we've walked, and through the darkest point of our life?
some of us can only mourn for the lost of our love, despite years.
those who tried to forget, never really do.
sometimes you really hope that those who grew up with you, could really be truthful and standby you always.
but, they never really do.
we all thought so.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
shit stirrer.
for this post, i am not agitated.
i'm as rationale and as calm as i am.
but let me name you "asshole".
for some reason, this fake profile of U is created.
if you're so fucking free to stalk on others life and creating this fake account and label me as "andrew", extracting all sorts of old photos of the past. then, i think you're really fucking free.
for the photos you've extracted, it's not in any of my album.
you're a close suspect of the clique with the ladies you know, hence it doesn't really bother me.
you are definitely out of my friends list, and you do not really know who our mutual friends were.
you're someone close to her, and even remember/know quotes she used long before.
you probably have a psychotic split personality which probably have some kind of grudges inside you, with either of us.
your motive:
- to stir hatred or a more in depth misunderstanding between people
- to make others hate me (to make others think i am the fucking free man to do sucha stuff)
- instilling hatred in the ones and family members who were once dear and close to my heart
you're just trying to make things ugly, and wish to laugh and watch whatever that may happen.
whoever you are, you're simply too free.
please go and do something better at your free time, and fuck off.
you've been shortlisted by me, and i probably know who you are.
too free? carry on.
i can't be bothered by your request.
your plan to make me feel what you want me to feel, has failed terribly.
i've stopped feeling anything.
just too bad. haha.
for this post, i am not agitated.
i'm as rationale and as calm as i am.
but let me name you "asshole".
for some reason, this fake profile of U is created.
if you're so fucking free to stalk on others life and creating this fake account and label me as "andrew", extracting all sorts of old photos of the past. then, i think you're really fucking free.
for the photos you've extracted, it's not in any of my album.
you're a close suspect of the clique with the ladies you know, hence it doesn't really bother me.
you are definitely out of my friends list, and you do not really know who our mutual friends were.
you're someone close to her, and even remember/know quotes she used long before.
you probably have a psychotic split personality which probably have some kind of grudges inside you, with either of us.
your motive:
- to stir hatred or a more in depth misunderstanding between people
- to make others hate me (to make others think i am the fucking free man to do sucha stuff)
- instilling hatred in the ones and family members who were once dear and close to my heart
you're just trying to make things ugly, and wish to laugh and watch whatever that may happen.
whoever you are, you're simply too free.
please go and do something better at your free time, and fuck off.
you've been shortlisted by me, and i probably know who you are.
too free? carry on.
i can't be bothered by your request.
your plan to make me feel what you want me to feel, has failed terribly.
i've stopped feeling anything.
just too bad. haha.
Monday, September 20, 2010
走进走出
suddenly i've got this very positive feeling towards what's gonna be ahead in life.
we're all in our prime years, so it's critical to add value to yourself, and keep exploring more into the meaning of life and the world.
freedom is the key to success.
god has his plans for your fate. he will bring the best to you - someday.
well, i still believe a real r/s is when you've found your opposite gender best friend (he/she will see the best of you and the ugliest of you), all your past with somebody is revealed/shared through time with him/her through endless talks and then accepted.
a very honest and true r/s.
i guess, that will make you and the r/s very much valuable.
the perception of people moving on from one r/s to another (psychologically - they explained that people who are love dependent/ afraid of loneliness, would do so to forget all that is in the past/ to fulfill what they want as of tentative) has gradually lose the real meaning of r/s with people.
it'll somehow end, someday again.
the real time line to forget or have a vague memories of the past/people will take about 2-3 years exactly for all wounds to be healed.
they actually care; they run, they always run away from life, forgetting to really overcome their feelings/ emotions by themselves and face who they really are.
"if the world turns bad, even if the world can be the ugliest. you must not be one of them, carry on and be good, be who you really are."
i was inspired by my doctor who told me this.
time's not up, still too early.
what comes around, goes around.
suddenly i've got this very positive feeling towards what's gonna be ahead in life.
we're all in our prime years, so it's critical to add value to yourself, and keep exploring more into the meaning of life and the world.
freedom is the key to success.
god has his plans for your fate. he will bring the best to you - someday.
well, i still believe a real r/s is when you've found your opposite gender best friend (he/she will see the best of you and the ugliest of you), all your past with somebody is revealed/shared through time with him/her through endless talks and then accepted.
a very honest and true r/s.
i guess, that will make you and the r/s very much valuable.
the perception of people moving on from one r/s to another (psychologically - they explained that people who are love dependent/ afraid of loneliness, would do so to forget all that is in the past/ to fulfill what they want as of tentative) has gradually lose the real meaning of r/s with people.
it'll somehow end, someday again.
the real time line to forget or have a vague memories of the past/people will take about 2-3 years exactly for all wounds to be healed.
they actually care; they run, they always run away from life, forgetting to really overcome their feelings/ emotions by themselves and face who they really are.
"if the world turns bad, even if the world can be the ugliest. you must not be one of them, carry on and be good, be who you really are."
i was inspired by my doctor who told me this.
time's not up, still too early.
what comes around, goes around.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
leave.
they always say, if you left something
don't try to bring anything along
it's not gonna be the same.
and i was taught/told not to touch anything that you considered yours, nothing mutual as you may regard.
so, don't do what you preached.
you formed a new life, leave what's behind - behind.
you made the decision, the choice for your fate - your destination.
that's what everyone does, don't you see?
they don't try mingling, nor duplicate actions/words of the past.
"i never like to use sweet words to make you happy, if it's not from my heart. i'll probably say things to make you lose faith and feel disappointed. so, were you up for the test of time, and how much you remember about love?
i always believe (myself) in whatever i choose to commit my time/effort in. only time, will my actions speaks for itself, making you happy - a life time." - soulmate
they always say, if you left something
don't try to bring anything along
it's not gonna be the same.
and i was taught/told not to touch anything that you considered yours, nothing mutual as you may regard.
so, don't do what you preached.
you formed a new life, leave what's behind - behind.
you made the decision, the choice for your fate - your destination.
that's what everyone does, don't you see?
they don't try mingling, nor duplicate actions/words of the past.
"i never like to use sweet words to make you happy, if it's not from my heart. i'll probably say things to make you lose faith and feel disappointed. so, were you up for the test of time, and how much you remember about love?
i always believe (myself) in whatever i choose to commit my time/effort in. only time, will my actions speaks for itself, making you happy - a life time." - soulmate
Sunday, September 12, 2010
感情vs爱情
有人说不管时间过了多久
没了爱情... 感情总还是有吧?
人.. 真的会怀念感情吗?
你是否还记得.. 一段感情/爱情纯真的美好?
ha.. 真可笑...
回忆.. 总是在脑海里..
清晰.. 可见...
but well.. I guess this article (extract) which I came across, explains why.
"If a person has an experience that is physically, mentally or emotionally traumatic, the mind deals with the situation in one of several different ways. Some people abuse alcohol, food, drugs or other substances to numb the feelings they have inside. Others mourn for a short period of time, restore their faith, balance and sanity, and somehow miraculously move on.
But the rest of us left over, usually those who are very analytical and logical, have trouble processing deeply troubling situations. So, we replay the painful situation over and over again in our minds, searching for an answer. But the problem is, the answer cannot be found in the rational mind, because the problem is on an emotional plain. Therefore, the solution has to come from the heart, which needs to be healed and restored."
how you wish sometimes you could be less logical and analytical.
"we live in a world of lies & many hidden truth; what was real became surreal, what's dream became a fantasy. Humans forgo guilt/conscience/kinships/friendships which we learn since young & over the years, to move on. At the start, it's always "He/She/I'm so glad/ thank god to have met you..!" The end states, "no one is worth that sympathy nor apology". Much less, the basic respect for the relationships built."
有人说不管时间过了多久
没了爱情... 感情总还是有吧?
人.. 真的会怀念感情吗?
你是否还记得.. 一段感情/爱情纯真的美好?
ha.. 真可笑...
回忆.. 总是在脑海里..
清晰.. 可见...
but well.. I guess this article (extract) which I came across, explains why.
"If a person has an experience that is physically, mentally or emotionally traumatic, the mind deals with the situation in one of several different ways. Some people abuse alcohol, food, drugs or other substances to numb the feelings they have inside. Others mourn for a short period of time, restore their faith, balance and sanity, and somehow miraculously move on.
But the rest of us left over, usually those who are very analytical and logical, have trouble processing deeply troubling situations. So, we replay the painful situation over and over again in our minds, searching for an answer. But the problem is, the answer cannot be found in the rational mind, because the problem is on an emotional plain. Therefore, the solution has to come from the heart, which needs to be healed and restored."
how you wish sometimes you could be less logical and analytical.
"we live in a world of lies & many hidden truth; what was real became surreal, what's dream became a fantasy. Humans forgo guilt/conscience/kinships/friendships which we learn since young & over the years, to move on. At the start, it's always "He/She/I'm so glad/ thank god to have met you..!" The end states, "no one is worth that sympathy nor apology". Much less, the basic respect for the relationships built."
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
unriddle
for some reasons, perhaps the many things in life will stay a riddle.
for some, what they lost are never the wealth nor luxuries in life,
but someone who really loves them and took very much effort to take care of them with heart.
something most valuable, and only till one day will you understand the depth of - true love.
"if you love someone, set them free. if they don't come back, they probably refused to ask for directions and got lost."
for some reasons, perhaps the many things in life will stay a riddle.
for some, what they lost are never the wealth nor luxuries in life,
but someone who really loves them and took very much effort to take care of them with heart.
something most valuable, and only till one day will you understand the depth of - true love.
"if you love someone, set them free. if they don't come back, they probably refused to ask for directions and got lost."
Sunday, August 29, 2010
my first ever video on YOUTUBE.
Basic Military Talk Episode 07
well, the only episode that needs a soldier to wear CV I guess?
good and bad criticism are no doubt inevitable.
if you do really notice my speech when i was in uniform? i was really quite nervous because all my bosses are watching me filming.
5 minutes of fame took me about 4 hours of filming? from pre-filming preparation till the end.
who says medic got no 6 pacs? i didn't strip for you to see only.
Zzz. -.-
Hope you all enjoy the entertaining video.
Find it weird to see myself on a video though. =S
Basic Military Talk Episode 07
well, the only episode that needs a soldier to wear CV I guess?
good and bad criticism are no doubt inevitable.
if you do really notice my speech when i was in uniform? i was really quite nervous because all my bosses are watching me filming.
5 minutes of fame took me about 4 hours of filming? from pre-filming preparation till the end.
who says medic got no 6 pacs? i didn't strip for you to see only.
Zzz. -.-
Hope you all enjoy the entertaining video.
Find it weird to see myself on a video though. =S
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
1 Story, 2 Share
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.
So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6.
By Stephanie Halmilton
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.
So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6.
By Stephanie Halmilton
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
values.
aftershock.
good movie, touching.
many values involve and everything.
love can be simple isn't it?
sometimes.. do you ever value the love you build and and time spent with somebody/someone over time?
how do we define quality/quantity time? how can love be measured/balanced?
can you miss the one you love dearly for 32 years?
i guess not many people do now.
we all kept moving on, and soon enough everything loses it's meaning and it's value.
true love happens when you sacrifices your time/life for someone, somebody. be it the hardest time, he or she will be so ever understanding.
love makes us irrational.
i enjoying tearing and watching movies.
it makes me feel again, somehow.
BASIC MILITARY TALK IS ON EPISODE 6!!!
MINE IS 7 I THINK.
COMING SOON... =))
aftershock.
good movie, touching.
many values involve and everything.
love can be simple isn't it?
sometimes.. do you ever value the love you build and and time spent with somebody/someone over time?
how do we define quality/quantity time? how can love be measured/balanced?
can you miss the one you love dearly for 32 years?
i guess not many people do now.
we all kept moving on, and soon enough everything loses it's meaning and it's value.
true love happens when you sacrifices your time/life for someone, somebody. be it the hardest time, he or she will be so ever understanding.
love makes us irrational.
i enjoying tearing and watching movies.
it makes me feel again, somehow.
BASIC MILITARY TALK IS ON EPISODE 6!!!
MINE IS 7 I THINK.
COMING SOON... =))
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
time.
recently been busy with:
school.
job hunt.
interviewsss.
planning itineraries for overseas.
attending gathering sessions and catch up with various groups.
well, i had interviews such as b***** tr_der/s_les en***eer.
the sensor-ed part serve as a purpose unable people to google about such related jobs.
c*nsumer b_nking, while on hold as back up.
the rest i kinda rejected them.
i suppose it has been going quite well. some firms almost did wanna confirm me.
as for b***** tr_der, the interview was pretty straight forward.
it talks about whether a not you're up to the game of lies and everything and to entertainment of course.
as for myself, i guess it's pretty much about values VS $$$.
now i truly understand why the man once said he feels lonely/tired/sad with his wine.
betrayal of your soul, your love ones.
you drink till your liver probably fails you one day.
all in all, for the sake of providing a better life for your family.
the many things we may enjoy today, may all be taken for granted. we didn't know we had actually put life at stake, shortening life span.
but well, it solely depends on what we want in life; luxuries or a simple yet truly cohesive family, without lies.
talked to my family about it, maybe it have yet to reach the age for the job.
hence, i guess i will fall back and stay focus as s_les en***eer which offers me a good p_y package where i can afford a car, and many traveling opportunities like Jap & other regional countries. All in all, it's probably far better than those new degree graduate's pay and definitely a good start.
well, managed to clinched the 2nd interview. will know the final result in the next 2 days or so. even if i failed, at least the interview experience was definitely a good one.
till then, play well with my part time studies, probably till when studies are done, i could take the risk and afford the game (single of course) as b***** tr_der.
betrayal doesn't seem to be allowed in my dictionary if attached.
back on the serious note, if the job prospect and progression is well to do, i aimed to be a senior s_les eng-er in 3 years time or till by then when i graduate.
the time line seems just right as of now; if confirmed till after probation period and till school officially starts next year.
Have you heard?
of the 7 year itch? where things become stagnant, how you feel today no longer stays the same, the other party walk out of you at your worse times.
the faster the progression, the faster passion burns out.
the ugly truth about life; sometimes you wonder how much you kissed, how much you love each other, how much of life and yourself you shared with your partner, how much bad times and good times you went through, and today you became just total strangers.
everything seems to boil down to ZERO value.
sometimes, people need to be tested through time with all the nonsense be it rationale or irrational:
be it your ugliest times
be it the times you are broke like shit
be it when you were angry and go bonkers
be it the times you're so sick and vomit
be it the times you're bedridden and can't even clean your own mess
is there any fairytale in here?
it's the reality of every aspect, in life.
i would once again, for the one i love.
but i guess i've enveloped myself, no longer feeling anything for anyone.
p.s. why waste time getting into r/s when all that ever happens has no forever? but only tearful memories for you to reminisce from time to time?
TURN OFF
it's pretty turn off to have people who text you like they know you damn fcuking well/ putting a judgmental comment on your character/perception SOOO soon when they hardly understand your past/experience.
don't love/like/interested in me soooo soon, i don't believe in that.
please, be my best friend at least before you try again.
-.-
today just seems so bluey, and i just don't know why.
pms always seems to come around when the month is coming to an end?
and seems like most of my post are always on the 28th.
people always seems to be reading more of my blog when it's near 28th as well.
btw, you don't really have to catch up with friends only when your 'current' isn't around in SG.
i do not really *like* the idea of them being make use of, to fill your void as much as i understand that we do have mutual friends.
your profile seems by far, consist the most amount of bedroom pictures.
please, save some pride and privacy for yourself.
there's USB and other means of file transfer technology than being really hardworking to upload them.
at least love and take care of your, name.
recently been busy with:
school.
job hunt.
interviewsss.
planning itineraries for overseas.
attending gathering sessions and catch up with various groups.
well, i had interviews such as b***** tr_der/s_les en***eer.
the sensor-ed part serve as a purpose unable people to google about such related jobs.
c*nsumer b_nking, while on hold as back up.
the rest i kinda rejected them.
i suppose it has been going quite well. some firms almost did wanna confirm me.
as for b***** tr_der, the interview was pretty straight forward.
it talks about whether a not you're up to the game of lies and everything and to entertainment of course.
as for myself, i guess it's pretty much about values VS $$$.
now i truly understand why the man once said he feels lonely/tired/sad with his wine.
betrayal of your soul, your love ones.
you drink till your liver probably fails you one day.
all in all, for the sake of providing a better life for your family.
the many things we may enjoy today, may all be taken for granted. we didn't know we had actually put life at stake, shortening life span.
but well, it solely depends on what we want in life; luxuries or a simple yet truly cohesive family, without lies.
talked to my family about it, maybe it have yet to reach the age for the job.
hence, i guess i will fall back and stay focus as s_les en***eer which offers me a good p_y package where i can afford a car, and many traveling opportunities like Jap & other regional countries. All in all, it's probably far better than those new degree graduate's pay and definitely a good start.
well, managed to clinched the 2nd interview. will know the final result in the next 2 days or so. even if i failed, at least the interview experience was definitely a good one.
till then, play well with my part time studies, probably till when studies are done, i could take the risk and afford the game (single of course) as b***** tr_der.
betrayal doesn't seem to be allowed in my dictionary if attached.
back on the serious note, if the job prospect and progression is well to do, i aimed to be a senior s_les eng-er in 3 years time or till by then when i graduate.
the time line seems just right as of now; if confirmed till after probation period and till school officially starts next year.
Have you heard?
of the 7 year itch? where things become stagnant, how you feel today no longer stays the same, the other party walk out of you at your worse times.
the faster the progression, the faster passion burns out.
the ugly truth about life; sometimes you wonder how much you kissed, how much you love each other, how much of life and yourself you shared with your partner, how much bad times and good times you went through, and today you became just total strangers.
everything seems to boil down to ZERO value.
sometimes, people need to be tested through time with all the nonsense be it rationale or irrational:
be it your ugliest times
be it the times you are broke like shit
be it when you were angry and go bonkers
be it the times you're so sick and vomit
be it the times you're bedridden and can't even clean your own mess
is there any fairytale in here?
it's the reality of every aspect, in life.
i would once again, for the one i love.
but i guess i've enveloped myself, no longer feeling anything for anyone.
p.s. why waste time getting into r/s when all that ever happens has no forever? but only tearful memories for you to reminisce from time to time?
TURN OFF
it's pretty turn off to have people who text you like they know you damn fcuking well/ putting a judgmental comment on your character/perception SOOO soon when they hardly understand your past/experience.
don't love/like/interested in me soooo soon, i don't believe in that.
please, be my best friend at least before you try again.
-.-
today just seems so bluey, and i just don't know why.
pms always seems to come around when the month is coming to an end?
and seems like most of my post are always on the 28th.
people always seems to be reading more of my blog when it's near 28th as well.
btw, you don't really have to catch up with friends only when your 'current' isn't around in SG.
i do not really *like* the idea of them being make use of, to fill your void as much as i understand that we do have mutual friends.
your profile seems by far, consist the most amount of bedroom pictures.
please, save some pride and privacy for yourself.
there's USB and other means of file transfer technology than being really hardworking to upload them.
at least love and take care of your, name.
Friday, July 09, 2010
<<熟悉的陌生人>>
今天, went to run some errand
好久似乎没经过 Tampines Mall 了
最近忙到连想看部电影都没空
经过 Hokkaido Fair
她的影子从我脑海里浮现
也真巧的 给我碰上了
at the very moment while i was walking,
at the very second
and glance
我们...
擦肩而过 (加上中间人人所谓的 Big Hamster) - 封号不是我给的
...
你是否曾想过, 你能爱一个人到多久?
5年, 10年? 天长地久?
天长地久或许也只不过是爱情里一开始最虚伪的谎言
也是最终的痛苦
你是否曾想过, 你曾最信任, 最爱的人会变得如此陌生...
你是否曾想过, 今天与你度过最多时光的人会变得不曾相识.
many women told me, it's important to find someone who will love them for life.
yet again, when time allows us to take everything for granted.
when positive traits became magnified flaws today. (i.e. determination is seen as a positive character trait. yet, when it comes to break up, people seen you as being persistent; yet forgetting that it's actually your determination to work things out.)
everything has it pros and cons, nothing is regarded as good nor bad.
we're nobody to judge anybody.
"everything that happens today, is a replica. the difference lies in the caliber which suits the parameters for the process today.
if U changes with respect to Time. I remains the same."
as much as i love changes and challenges, i fear the change in a r/s. the agony of pain do actually haunt people subconsciously.
sometimes i wonder if it's fear that forbids me to commit into any form of r/s.
am i enclosing myself?
i want to be fair to them, i guess.
unlike when i know there are people who actually subconsciously tries to forget their ex-es by going for another r/s, leaving many things unresolved.
or sometimes when their "current" ain't free to company them, their mind went back to the past (start thinking/stalking) and also when they are subconsciously having comparison to their ex-es (for the good things; that's where they start to remember) when they're faced with quarrels or bad times with their "current".
being in one r/s ain't about sweet words that touches you. it ain't about the romances which you try to buy from ambiance/places. it ain't about the initial stage of love where hormones are burning, avoiding quarrels at all cost and you still hope for it to burn till ripe old age.
understanding, i say. love, care and concern.
& be your very true self. ultimately, who takes care of you best?
well..
you may be surprise; today, girls ask actually ask YOU out on a date, texts you ferociously even before you have the time to reply them. =.=
sometimes, life really makes you wonder about it's value.
有时候我心里会笑着说, "我的人生真的是所谓的; 人生如戏,戏如人生."
i do enjoy the solitary from time to time. peaceful, isn't it?
P.S. "熟悉的陌生人, 你好. 好久不见."
今天, went to run some errand
好久似乎没经过 Tampines Mall 了
最近忙到连想看部电影都没空
经过 Hokkaido Fair
她的影子从我脑海里浮现
也真巧的 给我碰上了
at the very moment while i was walking,
at the very second
and glance
我们...
擦肩而过 (加上中间人人所谓的 Big Hamster) - 封号不是我给的
...
你是否曾想过, 你能爱一个人到多久?
5年, 10年? 天长地久?
天长地久或许也只不过是爱情里一开始最虚伪的谎言
也是最终的痛苦
你是否曾想过, 你曾最信任, 最爱的人会变得如此陌生...
你是否曾想过, 今天与你度过最多时光的人会变得不曾相识.
many women told me, it's important to find someone who will love them for life.
yet again, when time allows us to take everything for granted.
when positive traits became magnified flaws today. (i.e. determination is seen as a positive character trait. yet, when it comes to break up, people seen you as being persistent; yet forgetting that it's actually your determination to work things out.)
everything has it pros and cons, nothing is regarded as good nor bad.
we're nobody to judge anybody.
"everything that happens today, is a replica. the difference lies in the caliber which suits the parameters for the process today.
if U changes with respect to Time. I remains the same."
as much as i love changes and challenges, i fear the change in a r/s. the agony of pain do actually haunt people subconsciously.
sometimes i wonder if it's fear that forbids me to commit into any form of r/s.
am i enclosing myself?
i want to be fair to them, i guess.
unlike when i know there are people who actually subconsciously tries to forget their ex-es by going for another r/s, leaving many things unresolved.
or sometimes when their "current" ain't free to company them, their mind went back to the past (start thinking/stalking) and also when they are subconsciously having comparison to their ex-es (for the good things; that's where they start to remember) when they're faced with quarrels or bad times with their "current".
being in one r/s ain't about sweet words that touches you. it ain't about the romances which you try to buy from ambiance/places. it ain't about the initial stage of love where hormones are burning, avoiding quarrels at all cost and you still hope for it to burn till ripe old age.
understanding, i say. love, care and concern.
& be your very true self. ultimately, who takes care of you best?
well..
you may be surprise; today, girls ask actually ask YOU out on a date, texts you ferociously even before you have the time to reply them. =.=
sometimes, life really makes you wonder about it's value.
有时候我心里会笑着说, "我的人生真的是所谓的; 人生如戏,戏如人生."
i do enjoy the solitary from time to time. peaceful, isn't it?
P.S. "熟悉的陌生人, 你好. 好久不见."
Friday, July 02, 2010
Life, Death & Love
most people will always think that my post is long. however, most of them always end up reading till the end.
interesting? or just out of curiosity?
an exciting day. worse case i've ever came across ever since i have been a medic specialist for the past 1 year.
fits was scary when i first saw it at airbase when i first became a medic.
heat cramps/exhaustion wasn't so much of fear then, despite the screaming in the resuscitation room aka emergency room.
today was a asthmatic patient, yet i was calm as well. but i regard it as the most interesting case just as i'm gonna ORD.
he collapsed and found by others.
upper and lower limbs were all cramped up due to the lack of oxygen going into his brains and the other parts of the body.
lungs looks really tight like vacuumed.
1 crab, 2 crabs and 3 crabs were all in the resuscitation room helping/looking.
you wonder why.
it's the organisation's day and they had a parade. the guy was a ad-hoc man who was out of course due to his medical condition. he didn't had any physical activities, yet his attack came just by purely walking down the stairway and found by big shots.
we seriously work like as if we were in the hospital emergency room.
i followed to the hospital, doc was at the back with one of my colleague.
sirens were on, and we really rush as fast as we could.
i even cut myself. =(
he was gasping for air, like earth was depleting of oxygen.
i guess i could feel that kinda anxiety and struggle, totally.
he came from a well off family and i shan't further talk about the background.
but his parents weren't panick at all, to my surprise (to rush down to pay him a visit).
"it wasn't the first time. there were many times and they were use to it. they need to work."
then i thought, "so what if this is the last time? what's next? cry?"
work over kinship or what?
taken for granted.
we'll never know when is our last day, our last time we could do something and leave this world without regrets.
today, have you not done something that you should?
saying sorry to the ones you love?
doing what you could have done to make things better or the world a better place?
today, 'we' saved one life.
i know, it's a fulfillment and an experience no one can ever feel.
i've never regretted what god has given me today, to be a medic. i know clearly what to do if anything happens. the 'panick' me has long gone.
life as it is, but we must do our best.
in his eyes, i could feel that gratefulness, the care & concern and love we've shown.
i suppose we'll always say, "never take life too seriously, or you'll never live out of it."
but i guess all of us were wrong.
it's meant to be serious business, making full use of what you have today and not taking every little things that has always been there, for granted.
be contented.
cherish what god gave you.
love is simple and so is romance.
money can only buy what you use and wear today.
it's the heart that you gave, the commitment and effort you want to put into.
never let go of the ones we love and love us the most.
it'll always be our lost, for not knowing how to appreciate.
well, BB saw me at CGH. she still could recognise me. it's really nice to see them working at hospitals.
S saw me at the resuscitation room while i was trying to get information, she just stoned and look at me for a few seconds, till her colleague nudged her.
i couldn't remember her name, and i didn't wanna recognise her at that point of time where her mask is on and i can't remember her name at the same time. but well, sadly she was too busy for me to try to say 'sorry, but do you recongise me?' but i knew she did lah, so i was kinda ps. Zzz.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Casual.
i've got lotsa things i wanna do and buy.
- prepare for admission test
- job hunting
- japanese/french lessons
- surgery (considering)
- iphone 4
- lasik (to be referred by my doctor)??
- teeth whitening?
- panasonic GF1 camera/ video cam (feels damn good about it)
- soft rebonding for my hair
- japan/nz/aus backpacking trip??? well, my doc did it with his friends at NZ for 1 mth, work and play. sounds good but khakis dependent.
- LV wallet from Espanol (to be brought by RP)
- bags bags and more bags
- watch watch and more watches
i doubt my invesments profits are sufficient to fund me for all these. but at least half of them i suppose? hopefully by then, salary will fund up the rest and other lobangs. to be completed within the next 1 year and trips gonna depend on schedules and etc. =.=
but will definitely head to aust next year to find a friend of mine.
well, over at jap i've got a childhood friend over there as well.
shall see what i can do.
well, that's life on a lighter note.
July is here to come, time to donate BLOOD!!!
most people will always think that my post is long. however, most of them always end up reading till the end.
interesting? or just out of curiosity?
an exciting day. worse case i've ever came across ever since i have been a medic specialist for the past 1 year.
fits was scary when i first saw it at airbase when i first became a medic.
heat cramps/exhaustion wasn't so much of fear then, despite the screaming in the resuscitation room aka emergency room.
today was a asthmatic patient, yet i was calm as well. but i regard it as the most interesting case just as i'm gonna ORD.
he collapsed and found by others.
upper and lower limbs were all cramped up due to the lack of oxygen going into his brains and the other parts of the body.
lungs looks really tight like vacuumed.
1 crab, 2 crabs and 3 crabs were all in the resuscitation room helping/looking.
you wonder why.
it's the organisation's day and they had a parade. the guy was a ad-hoc man who was out of course due to his medical condition. he didn't had any physical activities, yet his attack came just by purely walking down the stairway and found by big shots.
we seriously work like as if we were in the hospital emergency room.
i followed to the hospital, doc was at the back with one of my colleague.
sirens were on, and we really rush as fast as we could.
i even cut myself. =(
he was gasping for air, like earth was depleting of oxygen.
i guess i could feel that kinda anxiety and struggle, totally.
he came from a well off family and i shan't further talk about the background.
but his parents weren't panick at all, to my surprise (to rush down to pay him a visit).
"it wasn't the first time. there were many times and they were use to it. they need to work."
then i thought, "so what if this is the last time? what's next? cry?"
work over kinship or what?
taken for granted.
we'll never know when is our last day, our last time we could do something and leave this world without regrets.
today, have you not done something that you should?
saying sorry to the ones you love?
doing what you could have done to make things better or the world a better place?
today, 'we' saved one life.
i know, it's a fulfillment and an experience no one can ever feel.
i've never regretted what god has given me today, to be a medic. i know clearly what to do if anything happens. the 'panick' me has long gone.
life as it is, but we must do our best.
in his eyes, i could feel that gratefulness, the care & concern and love we've shown.
i suppose we'll always say, "never take life too seriously, or you'll never live out of it."
but i guess all of us were wrong.
it's meant to be serious business, making full use of what you have today and not taking every little things that has always been there, for granted.
be contented.
cherish what god gave you.
love is simple and so is romance.
money can only buy what you use and wear today.
it's the heart that you gave, the commitment and effort you want to put into.
never let go of the ones we love and love us the most.
it'll always be our lost, for not knowing how to appreciate.
well, BB saw me at CGH. she still could recognise me. it's really nice to see them working at hospitals.
S saw me at the resuscitation room while i was trying to get information, she just stoned and look at me for a few seconds, till her colleague nudged her.
i couldn't remember her name, and i didn't wanna recognise her at that point of time where her mask is on and i can't remember her name at the same time. but well, sadly she was too busy for me to try to say 'sorry, but do you recongise me?' but i knew she did lah, so i was kinda ps. Zzz.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Casual.
i've got lotsa things i wanna do and buy.
- prepare for admission test
- job hunting
- japanese/french lessons
- surgery (considering)
- iphone 4
- lasik (to be referred by my doctor)??
- teeth whitening?
- panasonic GF1 camera/ video cam (feels damn good about it)
- soft rebonding for my hair
- japan/nz/aus backpacking trip??? well, my doc did it with his friends at NZ for 1 mth, work and play. sounds good but khakis dependent.
- LV wallet from Espanol (to be brought by RP)
- bags bags and more bags
- watch watch and more watches
i doubt my invesments profits are sufficient to fund me for all these. but at least half of them i suppose? hopefully by then, salary will fund up the rest and other lobangs. to be completed within the next 1 year and trips gonna depend on schedules and etc. =.=
but will definitely head to aust next year to find a friend of mine.
well, over at jap i've got a childhood friend over there as well.
shall see what i can do.
well, that's life on a lighter note.
July is here to come, time to donate BLOOD!!!
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Pre-mature Greying of Hair.
Yes, I'm suffering from this.
Worse than ever during my studying time.
Top of my head, a patch of hair are greying up.
None of my family members has any history of this.
The most common of all is only a few strands.
I wonder what has the past 10 months got me into.
Eccentrically insane?
Researched:
Grey hair, gives the indication of improper protein synthesis. The pigment melanin is responsible for the change of hair colours. Early greying of the hair is basically hereditary, and we can inherit it from one of our parents or grandparents.
Grey hair can also be influenced by stress. A person experiencing a prolonged period of stress and anxiety may notice, over a period of time, white hairs gradually appearing. Malnutrition, worry, shock, deep sorrow, tension and other similar conditions may also slow down the production of melanin resulting in grey hair.
Gonna dye it BLACK.
Yes, I'm suffering from this.
Worse than ever during my studying time.
Top of my head, a patch of hair are greying up.
None of my family members has any history of this.
The most common of all is only a few strands.
I wonder what has the past 10 months got me into.
Eccentrically insane?
Researched:
Grey hair, gives the indication of improper protein synthesis. The pigment melanin is responsible for the change of hair colours. Early greying of the hair is basically hereditary, and we can inherit it from one of our parents or grandparents.
Grey hair can also be influenced by stress. A person experiencing a prolonged period of stress and anxiety may notice, over a period of time, white hairs gradually appearing. Malnutrition, worry, shock, deep sorrow, tension and other similar conditions may also slow down the production of melanin resulting in grey hair.
Gonna dye it BLACK.
Monday, June 21, 2010
SO MUCH TO BLOG ABOUT, LIFESTYLES & EVERYTHING.
Blog song changed as well according to mood and this was something I came across through a friend. In this, it brings me back many memories during that period of my childhood.
Have been a little sick lately. Now, I can and know what drugs to dispense for myself for normal sickness.
Well, I wonder if it's due to the rushing up and down from work, then to school.
Improper dinner every alternate days.
I guess age is really catching up.
I used to teach tuition and woke up as early as 7 on a Saturday. So am I doing so nowadays, going for tutorial lessons in the morning for a good 3 hours.
Well, in the past my day for Saturday end on a Sunday morning of 3-4am and would usually wake up again on a 11am basis the next. Today, I slept till 3PM.
It has been sometime since we all start bowling again, and watching mid-night movie till 3AM. Past weeks has been busy for everyone I guess, busy with our very own life.
Lesser parties nowadays and getting on with serious business in life.
It has been a LONG away break from civilian life, and through these 2 years, there happened a LONG break for me (really slacker life after 1 year soldier) and BIG break of course. Well, engine are all kicking in, life is starting to be busy, just like before enlisted.
The last was Henessy Artistry Party @ St. James's PH. It was a great event, manage to smoke 5 invitation in exchange for 10 guests. 5 for JK's friend, including myself and J plus 4 other friends.
There I was in the queue and video camera pop out. Well, I wonder if that short clip of mine would appear anywhere online for the event. Some artists, models, medias and etc were present. Totally a different atmosphere from the normal clubbing scene. Free flow of mixes. It was great definitely.
Well, St. James PH has became my turf for bridging relationships with people. Getting 7 people in at 'under table' basis of 100 bucks with people. Cutting the VIP queue and getting friend in for free; causing the ladies behind to go like O.o?!
haha.
Well, people nowadays are getting on and off relationships with people. People are moving on faster than before. But, well. I guess single is good. No hurt, no pain, no responsibilities.
Today, I earn, I spend myself happily. Well, dates? I had a few dates for 2-3 weeks past a couple of months back. Well, they ain't having any true feelings involve. They were just infatuations people have I suppose? Well, I've stopped completely. It's a waste of my time/energy and money. =.=
Love is a natural occuring process. It's not about sweet words and chasing after. It ain't about dating, finding nor looking.
I guess I prefer making more good girls friends, knowing and learning more in upcoming years.
From time to time, having some good meals with friends/buddies/besties, buying them meals are far better off than spending on unnecessary dates. In here, building a lifetime relationships with them, I found fulfillment as well.
Spare time? Loneliness? Nah, please. There are many more self-developments things which you can do.
Like my Doctor also my friend, at the age of 27, he earn his own, drive his own, spend his own, carefree, date when he is interested in someone but well, he date those who he has been friends for 4-5 years?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I guess a true relationship is about knowing someone, somebody as friend for a year and even for many more years to come. It's when you knew and fully seen all his/her imperfections. You love him/her very true self and his or her past. It's probably being very best friends for years.
Romance are just little actions which you give from time to time, the love the care the concern despite years.
Someday, reality will set in. Managing family, finances and the many routine and mundane stuff in life, sweet words becomes more hypocritical.
Love is like when you formed True Partnership, like best friends in working every way out, never giving up this life time.
Well, humans will never be satisfied and everything will become bored one day. Ultimately, we've got to understand where our contentment lies and tell ourselves it's enough, and the rest that you get are bonus. Then, no expectations or anything further from your partner.
I guess I still believe in the last statement ultimately in marriage vows; "will you take care and be there for your spouse despite wealth and health."
Although as hypothetical as it can be from the above statement; as long as your spouse is trying their best to give what they could for you, with a heart, what else can you expect for?
He/she needs to love you at your ugliest look as ever happen before and the ugliest things you do and be there at where you are.
Probably when you're down with fever and whatever, he/she is there taking care of you through the night, making sure you're at best treated.
Sometimes, I wonder how can I ever really take myself to love someone again? Is like, I once did my best with all that I could. It was never a failure, but a well lesson learned as they say.
They always moved on to fill their void.
Do you ever remember those times where just holding onto someone's hand, sweetness just seep through both of your hands? Are you ready to really take care of someone?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR YOU
Well, no one is at fault today. It's the skills of managing the relationship I guess. Well, some of my friends broke up too, they end up happy best friends. Some patched, some are still cool.
Sometimes, I wished the break up wasn't a phone call, wasn't a simple letter. It was suppose to be a talk, a nice one where very much of honest unhappiness should be voiced.
Well, I can be understanding towards the character, the way you are. Perhaps so, things just went your way. Hence, 'my way'; a more appropriate way which I suppose, wasn't carried out.
I guess Love is selfish? It's never fair to either party then.
Today, if it were ever happened to me, when she ASKED. I would say honestly upfront, "I love her, and we can't work out. My apologies, but we can always be friends."
Sometimes, I do wish today situations were better off. Perhaps, for that basic respect, for how long you have knew someone, for the sake of friendship, for the sake of the no. of happy years spent, honesty was a baseline for being responsible.
It isn't about who doesn't owe who what nor who owe who what. It's respect and responsibility for someone, somebody, a friend.
Running to allow time to resolve everything, one day, someday?
Today when you have started another relationship, how would you end things off maturely and more professionally if everything were to end one day?
well, 老牛吃嫩草; there's still working environment, very much more changes to come when things becomes bored and not as fresh one day. If someone were once to be a bastard, he/she will be a bastard twice as I believe.
There are many more years to come and counting on.
So how do you see the value of a relationship today?
You break off with your someone and get on with someone a few days/weeks later, because you have fallen for someone else?
Well, ex-CPL Armour Tech.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
LIFESTYLE: Skin Care
Recently, I've brought 7 skin care products as recommended by my Doctor from Sasa.
From toner to hydrating moisturizer, to sun screen cream, BB cream, makeup remover for BB cream, daily cleanser, exfoliate wash.
Most of it are products from Japan and Korea, only the exfoliate one is from Swiss.
Methods and care for your skin:
Well, exfoliate once a week and after exfoliate, do a clarifying mask. This is where your inner skin is more exposed and sensitive. Clarifying mask will absorb all impurities more appropriately. Say a Sunday then.
Differing cream use ONLY once/twice a week at night, you need to get Doctor's prescription for this. But well, it will aggravate pimples if you use it too frequent. Say Wednesday & Saturday NIGHT?
Every day after daily wash, have toner on, followed by hydrating moisturizer, Acne Cream if applicable on affected areas (only at night for none serious cases), Sun screen/BB Cream.
So you left with Monday, Tues, Thurs and Friday night.
You can have anti-wrinkled/anti sag cream to be applied on your eye areas on these days. Well, before that, you can have 100% PURE Aloe Vera to hydrate your skin if time permits. Leave it on for 15 minutes and WASH OFF.
Any facial products you use, try not to contain any form of ALCOHOL content. It will cause your pores to open more, sensitive, promote dryness, if not appropriately taken care of.
Can check out these brands, DR.G, Juju (toner and hydrating moisturizer) and Dermalogica. They are the top selling brands.
Lastly, do not keep changing skin care products once you have really use the good ones. Stick to it. Otherwise it'll be bad for your skin.
Well, that's not all, I'm still learning.
I'm trying to finish all my leftovers before I offically start on the ones I brought. Hopefully, by the time I ORD-ed.
It's really great to know Doctors, and I mean not the normal GP but Specialized ones. LOL. I know a number of them, from gynecologist (can help my wife to deliver), Pediatric Doctor (see my child for any case)and Orthopedic Doctor (when I'm old or have bone injuries). Well, I also got to know hairstylist Recruit who works at Jean Yip for 3-4 years earning like 3-4K per month as Senior Hairstylist. =.=
Well, interesting.
Blog song changed as well according to mood and this was something I came across through a friend. In this, it brings me back many memories during that period of my childhood.
Have been a little sick lately. Now, I can and know what drugs to dispense for myself for normal sickness.
Well, I wonder if it's due to the rushing up and down from work, then to school.
Improper dinner every alternate days.
I guess age is really catching up.
I used to teach tuition and woke up as early as 7 on a Saturday. So am I doing so nowadays, going for tutorial lessons in the morning for a good 3 hours.
Well, in the past my day for Saturday end on a Sunday morning of 3-4am and would usually wake up again on a 11am basis the next. Today, I slept till 3PM.
It has been sometime since we all start bowling again, and watching mid-night movie till 3AM. Past weeks has been busy for everyone I guess, busy with our very own life.
Lesser parties nowadays and getting on with serious business in life.
It has been a LONG away break from civilian life, and through these 2 years, there happened a LONG break for me (really slacker life after 1 year soldier) and BIG break of course. Well, engine are all kicking in, life is starting to be busy, just like before enlisted.
The last was Henessy Artistry Party @ St. James's PH. It was a great event, manage to smoke 5 invitation in exchange for 10 guests. 5 for JK's friend, including myself and J plus 4 other friends.
There I was in the queue and video camera pop out. Well, I wonder if that short clip of mine would appear anywhere online for the event. Some artists, models, medias and etc were present. Totally a different atmosphere from the normal clubbing scene. Free flow of mixes. It was great definitely.
Well, St. James PH has became my turf for bridging relationships with people. Getting 7 people in at 'under table' basis of 100 bucks with people. Cutting the VIP queue and getting friend in for free; causing the ladies behind to go like O.o?!
haha.
Well, people nowadays are getting on and off relationships with people. People are moving on faster than before. But, well. I guess single is good. No hurt, no pain, no responsibilities.
Today, I earn, I spend myself happily. Well, dates? I had a few dates for 2-3 weeks past a couple of months back. Well, they ain't having any true feelings involve. They were just infatuations people have I suppose? Well, I've stopped completely. It's a waste of my time/energy and money. =.=
Love is a natural occuring process. It's not about sweet words and chasing after. It ain't about dating, finding nor looking.
I guess I prefer making more good girls friends, knowing and learning more in upcoming years.
From time to time, having some good meals with friends/buddies/besties, buying them meals are far better off than spending on unnecessary dates. In here, building a lifetime relationships with them, I found fulfillment as well.
Spare time? Loneliness? Nah, please. There are many more self-developments things which you can do.
Like my Doctor also my friend, at the age of 27, he earn his own, drive his own, spend his own, carefree, date when he is interested in someone but well, he date those who he has been friends for 4-5 years?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I guess a true relationship is about knowing someone, somebody as friend for a year and even for many more years to come. It's when you knew and fully seen all his/her imperfections. You love him/her very true self and his or her past. It's probably being very best friends for years.
Romance are just little actions which you give from time to time, the love the care the concern despite years.
Someday, reality will set in. Managing family, finances and the many routine and mundane stuff in life, sweet words becomes more hypocritical.
Love is like when you formed True Partnership, like best friends in working every way out, never giving up this life time.
Well, humans will never be satisfied and everything will become bored one day. Ultimately, we've got to understand where our contentment lies and tell ourselves it's enough, and the rest that you get are bonus. Then, no expectations or anything further from your partner.
I guess I still believe in the last statement ultimately in marriage vows; "will you take care and be there for your spouse despite wealth and health."
Although as hypothetical as it can be from the above statement; as long as your spouse is trying their best to give what they could for you, with a heart, what else can you expect for?
He/she needs to love you at your ugliest look as ever happen before and the ugliest things you do and be there at where you are.
Probably when you're down with fever and whatever, he/she is there taking care of you through the night, making sure you're at best treated.
Sometimes, I wonder how can I ever really take myself to love someone again? Is like, I once did my best with all that I could. It was never a failure, but a well lesson learned as they say.
They always moved on to fill their void.
Do you ever remember those times where just holding onto someone's hand, sweetness just seep through both of your hands? Are you ready to really take care of someone?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR YOU
Well, no one is at fault today. It's the skills of managing the relationship I guess. Well, some of my friends broke up too, they end up happy best friends. Some patched, some are still cool.
Sometimes, I wished the break up wasn't a phone call, wasn't a simple letter. It was suppose to be a talk, a nice one where very much of honest unhappiness should be voiced.
Well, I can be understanding towards the character, the way you are. Perhaps so, things just went your way. Hence, 'my way'; a more appropriate way which I suppose, wasn't carried out.
I guess Love is selfish? It's never fair to either party then.
Today, if it were ever happened to me, when she ASKED. I would say honestly upfront, "I love her, and we can't work out. My apologies, but we can always be friends."
Sometimes, I do wish today situations were better off. Perhaps, for that basic respect, for how long you have knew someone, for the sake of friendship, for the sake of the no. of happy years spent, honesty was a baseline for being responsible.
It isn't about who doesn't owe who what nor who owe who what. It's respect and responsibility for someone, somebody, a friend.
Running to allow time to resolve everything, one day, someday?
Today when you have started another relationship, how would you end things off maturely and more professionally if everything were to end one day?
well, 老牛吃嫩草; there's still working environment, very much more changes to come when things becomes bored and not as fresh one day. If someone were once to be a bastard, he/she will be a bastard twice as I believe.
There are many more years to come and counting on.
So how do you see the value of a relationship today?
You break off with your someone and get on with someone a few days/weeks later, because you have fallen for someone else?
Well, ex-CPL Armour Tech.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
LIFESTYLE: Skin Care
Recently, I've brought 7 skin care products as recommended by my Doctor from Sasa.
From toner to hydrating moisturizer, to sun screen cream, BB cream, makeup remover for BB cream, daily cleanser, exfoliate wash.
Most of it are products from Japan and Korea, only the exfoliate one is from Swiss.
Methods and care for your skin:
Well, exfoliate once a week and after exfoliate, do a clarifying mask. This is where your inner skin is more exposed and sensitive. Clarifying mask will absorb all impurities more appropriately. Say a Sunday then.
Differing cream use ONLY once/twice a week at night, you need to get Doctor's prescription for this. But well, it will aggravate pimples if you use it too frequent. Say Wednesday & Saturday NIGHT?
Every day after daily wash, have toner on, followed by hydrating moisturizer, Acne Cream if applicable on affected areas (only at night for none serious cases), Sun screen/BB Cream.
So you left with Monday, Tues, Thurs and Friday night.
You can have anti-wrinkled/anti sag cream to be applied on your eye areas on these days. Well, before that, you can have 100% PURE Aloe Vera to hydrate your skin if time permits. Leave it on for 15 minutes and WASH OFF.
Any facial products you use, try not to contain any form of ALCOHOL content. It will cause your pores to open more, sensitive, promote dryness, if not appropriately taken care of.
Can check out these brands, DR.G, Juju (toner and hydrating moisturizer) and Dermalogica. They are the top selling brands.
Lastly, do not keep changing skin care products once you have really use the good ones. Stick to it. Otherwise it'll be bad for your skin.
Well, that's not all, I'm still learning.
I'm trying to finish all my leftovers before I offically start on the ones I brought. Hopefully, by the time I ORD-ed.
It's really great to know Doctors, and I mean not the normal GP but Specialized ones. LOL. I know a number of them, from gynecologist (can help my wife to deliver), Pediatric Doctor (see my child for any case)and Orthopedic Doctor (when I'm old or have bone injuries). Well, I also got to know hairstylist Recruit who works at Jean Yip for 3-4 years earning like 3-4K per month as Senior Hairstylist. =.=
Well, interesting.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Have you ever wonder… (extracted from http://newheightslifecoaching.typepad.com) with personal reviews...
Have you ever wondered: “Why is our relationship so hard? Things were so perfect when we first met - what happened?” Most likely, the answer is that you’ve left the first stage of your relationship, and have moved into another.
many a times we left feelings unresolved and moved on to another r/s. through time, we almost forgotten how the most real feelings was like to be in a true r/s. maybe like what C told me, even though she might be with a new guy now, she still misses her ex. but all she did was to psychologically tell herself that things has changed or he had change and isn't the one she loves. yet, it seems that through time, people actually do play a part in the deepest part of our souls.
so what happen today? is it ego that are keeping us from the many things we wish to salvage in life? or is it the case that people can actually forget those beautiful memories? only when we experience the hurt again, only then we'll learn to appreciate what has always been there?
But could it really be that easy?
Yes! Most people understand that relationships grow and change over time… but what many people don’t know is that they tend to evolve in the same way. There are specific, defined stages of long-term relationships, which offer new feelings, new challenges to overcome, and new opportunities for growth. And if you want your relationship to evolve into one of mutual respect, love and intimacy, it’s likely that you’ll have to experience all of the following relationship stages at some point or another. Take a look at the description of each phase – does any of this sound familiar?
Before we get started, you should know that most people experience these stages in this order, and will need to resolve the challenges in each stage before they can move successfully on to the next. Of course there are always exceptions to this rule. But for the most part, you can’t get out of experiencing all of these stages if you want a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Every couple will move through these stages at different speeds, and most people will experience each stage more than once – it is common to fluctuate from one stage to another.*
Okay, now that I’ve given you the basic info, let’s dig a little deeper….
5 Stages of Committed Relationships
Stage 1 – The Romance Stage
This is also known as the Courtship Phase or the Fantasy Stage, and can last anywhere from 2 months to 2 years. This is when you and your partner have just met, and everything is absolutely amazing (that's where they say love is blind, and one day you get shot and woke up from your dreams). You can’t get enough of each other. Neither of you can do any wrong in the eyes of the other… mainly because you’re both still on your best behavior. The focus in this stage is on commonalities – you have so many common interests, you could practically be the same person! You show your partner your absolute best self, and you try to please each other as much as possible. Conflict is seen as “bad” in this stage, and is avoided at all costs. You can’t imagine living without this person, so you begin spending as much time together as possible. This is the stage when our defenses are down the most, which allows you to be open to and fall in love. You and your partner are building an important foundation in this stage, so your relationship can grow. There are biological effects as well. When you’re in this stage, your body is producing enormous amounts of endorphins, which makes you feel unusually happy, positive and excited about everything in your life (this is that “head over heels in love” feeling!). This is the stage most often portrayed in movies and romantic novels, for obvious reasons. Bottom line – you are happier than you’ve ever been, and can’t imagine ever feeling any differently.
Stage 2 – The Disillusionment Stage
This stage is also known as the Familiarization Stage, or the Adjusting to Reality Phase. This is where you begin to realize that your partner is actually a human being (horror of horrors!). You get to know each other more and more, and as a result you start recognizing their various flaws and shortcomings. You see your partner in relaxed situations, and you become more relaxed as well. Since your body cannot possibly continue to produce the same levels of endorphins that it was in the beginning, those feelings of being on top of the world start to decline. Your partner’s little habits aren’t quite as cute as they used to be, but there is still enough goodwill from the Romance Stage that you’re willing to overlook them. This stage can start to trickle into your relationship slowly, as you begin to see your partner for who s/he really is. Or sometimes it happens all of a sudden, when there has been some sort of dishonesty or deceit. This phase can be confusing and discouraging, since you’ve just experienced so much openness and connection in the Romance Stage. However, at this stage, your main job is to learn how to communicate and resolve conflict with this person effectively, which is an important skill if you want your relationship to continue.
Stage 3 – The Power Struggle Stage
This stage is also known as the Disappointment Phase or Distress Stage. As the characteristics from the Disillusionment Phase intensify, they become harder and harder to deal with. You will most likely begin to pull away from each other in this stage. At this point, you both still believe that conflict is a “bad” thing, but you are increasingly aware of your many differences. You fight to draw boundaries in the relationship, and as a result even small annoyances become big issues. This is the stage where you define unacceptable behavior, and most couples have occasional or frequent thoughts of leaving the relationship. More and more often, you start to feel like your partner is self-centered or un-caring, or even worse, that they simply can’t be trusted. Deep resentments begin to build if you’re unable to resolve your issues in a respectful and mutually agreeable way. Many couples get stuck in this stage, because this way of interacting becomes normal in their relationship. This is when it is absolutely necessary to learn to manage your differences effectively - to communicate and work together as a team, even though it’s tempting to believe that your partner’s sole purpose on Earth is to make your life difficult. Not surprisingly, this is the stage most couples are in when they decide to break up or file for divorce. However, if they are able to negotiate all of the landmines during this phase, they’ll move on to….
Stage 4 – The Stability Stage
This is a restful and peaceful time, compared to the last stage. This stage is also known as the Friendship Phase or Reconciliation Stage. Some couples never make it to this stage, but the ones who do find that they have deeper feelings of love, connection and trust with their partner. You now have history together, and most people begin to rely on the predictability of the relationship. As you enter this stage, you begin to realize that your partner isn’t perfect, but your personal differences aren’t quite as threatening as they used to be. You’re able to resolve most of your differences, at least to some extent, and you become more confident in the relationship. Some people feel a sense of loss in this stage as they learn to accept their partner for who they truly are, since this means they have to let go of the fantasy that was established early on in the relationship. But for the most part, the deepening sense of friendship and commitment is a good trade-off for those early feelings of butterflies and excitement. This is also when you begin to re-establish your own outside interests and friendships, which were given up in the Romance Phase. There is some danger that you may begin to drift apart from or become bored with your partner in this phase, so you should try to maintain the connection that was created in the Romance Phase. Overall, this is the stage when you finally begin to feel comfortable and happy with your deepening relationship.
Stage 5 – The Commitment Stage
This stage is also known as the Acceptance Phase, the Transformation Stage, or the Real Love Phase. It is estimated that fewer than 5% of couples actually make it to this stage, according to The Relationship Institute. This is the stage when both couples have a clear notion of who their partner is, faults, foibles and weaknesses galore… yet they make a conscious choice to be with this person in spite of all of those things (and in some cases, because of those things). You are no longer with your partner because you need them, but because you’ve chosen them, which means the level of resentment you felt in the Power Struggle Phase has decreased, if not disappeared. If you’ve made it to this stage, you and your partner are a team. You genuinely love your partner, and you look out for their best interests just as much as you look out for your own. Your partner is your best friend. There are few surprises about your partner's habits or character in this phase. You’ve collaborated to overcome many challenges together, and have grown to accept and support each other without restriction. Your vision for your relationship is in congruence with who you are and what you both truly want. You have discussed your future together - you have similar life goals, and you feel encouraged to define your relationship further. Many couples decide to make a formal or public commitment to each other in this stage (such as marriage) to demonstrate their intention to continue their relationship. This is the stage in which your relationship becomes a true partnership.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
so what are you going for today?
butterflies in your stomach? romance?
or do you find someone who truly loves you?
i was once told, all it matters was how much you love me.
i guess no matter how long you date doesn't matter. wedding ceremonies doesn't matter as well.
what matters is, how long can you truly love somebody and hurdle through the many things in reality and creates a true relationship at the end of the day?
sometimes, i wonder where is the true value of a relationship which you have formed with somebody.
but well, love is blind as they say.
and change is as good as the end of a chapter or a death of a person.
everyone knows.
"why cherish people who doesn't cherish you?"
"what you've understood today, isn't what she does."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dear CPL Armour Technician Boy,
you better do what's right.
i've got all the fuck details i have of you.
take good care of your weak body.
i don't blame you for all the ugly situation and results we all have today.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Well, life's been busy.
Lessons have started.
Studies and career are my top priority.
Language studies are upcoming next, and so much so for playing of strings.
Good news for my investments.
Maturity are soon to come.
So does ORD.
Fitness are maintaining well. Running 5KM every now and then with my Doctor. Trying to clock between 15 ~20 minutes @ 5Km. i think it's good enough and running every other 2 days, toning at every other alternate days @ gym.
Otherwise, how to eat more nice and good food?!
Infusion for patients getting more and more skillful esp. after giving medical lessons for the special breed and more and more practice with the no. of patients and casualties from day to day.
shall focus and work hard and smart for the next 3 years.
life is short, live it well.
we don't have much time to lose.
keep learning, don't stop.
Cheers! =)
Have you ever wondered: “Why is our relationship so hard? Things were so perfect when we first met - what happened?” Most likely, the answer is that you’ve left the first stage of your relationship, and have moved into another.
many a times we left feelings unresolved and moved on to another r/s. through time, we almost forgotten how the most real feelings was like to be in a true r/s. maybe like what C told me, even though she might be with a new guy now, she still misses her ex. but all she did was to psychologically tell herself that things has changed or he had change and isn't the one she loves. yet, it seems that through time, people actually do play a part in the deepest part of our souls.
so what happen today? is it ego that are keeping us from the many things we wish to salvage in life? or is it the case that people can actually forget those beautiful memories? only when we experience the hurt again, only then we'll learn to appreciate what has always been there?
But could it really be that easy?
Yes! Most people understand that relationships grow and change over time… but what many people don’t know is that they tend to evolve in the same way. There are specific, defined stages of long-term relationships, which offer new feelings, new challenges to overcome, and new opportunities for growth. And if you want your relationship to evolve into one of mutual respect, love and intimacy, it’s likely that you’ll have to experience all of the following relationship stages at some point or another. Take a look at the description of each phase – does any of this sound familiar?
Before we get started, you should know that most people experience these stages in this order, and will need to resolve the challenges in each stage before they can move successfully on to the next. Of course there are always exceptions to this rule. But for the most part, you can’t get out of experiencing all of these stages if you want a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Every couple will move through these stages at different speeds, and most people will experience each stage more than once – it is common to fluctuate from one stage to another.*
Okay, now that I’ve given you the basic info, let’s dig a little deeper….
5 Stages of Committed Relationships
Stage 1 – The Romance Stage
This is also known as the Courtship Phase or the Fantasy Stage, and can last anywhere from 2 months to 2 years. This is when you and your partner have just met, and everything is absolutely amazing (that's where they say love is blind, and one day you get shot and woke up from your dreams). You can’t get enough of each other. Neither of you can do any wrong in the eyes of the other… mainly because you’re both still on your best behavior. The focus in this stage is on commonalities – you have so many common interests, you could practically be the same person! You show your partner your absolute best self, and you try to please each other as much as possible. Conflict is seen as “bad” in this stage, and is avoided at all costs. You can’t imagine living without this person, so you begin spending as much time together as possible. This is the stage when our defenses are down the most, which allows you to be open to and fall in love. You and your partner are building an important foundation in this stage, so your relationship can grow. There are biological effects as well. When you’re in this stage, your body is producing enormous amounts of endorphins, which makes you feel unusually happy, positive and excited about everything in your life (this is that “head over heels in love” feeling!). This is the stage most often portrayed in movies and romantic novels, for obvious reasons. Bottom line – you are happier than you’ve ever been, and can’t imagine ever feeling any differently.
Stage 2 – The Disillusionment Stage
This stage is also known as the Familiarization Stage, or the Adjusting to Reality Phase. This is where you begin to realize that your partner is actually a human being (horror of horrors!). You get to know each other more and more, and as a result you start recognizing their various flaws and shortcomings. You see your partner in relaxed situations, and you become more relaxed as well. Since your body cannot possibly continue to produce the same levels of endorphins that it was in the beginning, those feelings of being on top of the world start to decline. Your partner’s little habits aren’t quite as cute as they used to be, but there is still enough goodwill from the Romance Stage that you’re willing to overlook them. This stage can start to trickle into your relationship slowly, as you begin to see your partner for who s/he really is. Or sometimes it happens all of a sudden, when there has been some sort of dishonesty or deceit. This phase can be confusing and discouraging, since you’ve just experienced so much openness and connection in the Romance Stage. However, at this stage, your main job is to learn how to communicate and resolve conflict with this person effectively, which is an important skill if you want your relationship to continue.
Stage 3 – The Power Struggle Stage
This stage is also known as the Disappointment Phase or Distress Stage. As the characteristics from the Disillusionment Phase intensify, they become harder and harder to deal with. You will most likely begin to pull away from each other in this stage. At this point, you both still believe that conflict is a “bad” thing, but you are increasingly aware of your many differences. You fight to draw boundaries in the relationship, and as a result even small annoyances become big issues. This is the stage where you define unacceptable behavior, and most couples have occasional or frequent thoughts of leaving the relationship. More and more often, you start to feel like your partner is self-centered or un-caring, or even worse, that they simply can’t be trusted. Deep resentments begin to build if you’re unable to resolve your issues in a respectful and mutually agreeable way. Many couples get stuck in this stage, because this way of interacting becomes normal in their relationship. This is when it is absolutely necessary to learn to manage your differences effectively - to communicate and work together as a team, even though it’s tempting to believe that your partner’s sole purpose on Earth is to make your life difficult. Not surprisingly, this is the stage most couples are in when they decide to break up or file for divorce. However, if they are able to negotiate all of the landmines during this phase, they’ll move on to….
Stage 4 – The Stability Stage
This is a restful and peaceful time, compared to the last stage. This stage is also known as the Friendship Phase or Reconciliation Stage. Some couples never make it to this stage, but the ones who do find that they have deeper feelings of love, connection and trust with their partner. You now have history together, and most people begin to rely on the predictability of the relationship. As you enter this stage, you begin to realize that your partner isn’t perfect, but your personal differences aren’t quite as threatening as they used to be. You’re able to resolve most of your differences, at least to some extent, and you become more confident in the relationship. Some people feel a sense of loss in this stage as they learn to accept their partner for who they truly are, since this means they have to let go of the fantasy that was established early on in the relationship. But for the most part, the deepening sense of friendship and commitment is a good trade-off for those early feelings of butterflies and excitement. This is also when you begin to re-establish your own outside interests and friendships, which were given up in the Romance Phase. There is some danger that you may begin to drift apart from or become bored with your partner in this phase, so you should try to maintain the connection that was created in the Romance Phase. Overall, this is the stage when you finally begin to feel comfortable and happy with your deepening relationship.
Stage 5 – The Commitment Stage
This stage is also known as the Acceptance Phase, the Transformation Stage, or the Real Love Phase. It is estimated that fewer than 5% of couples actually make it to this stage, according to The Relationship Institute. This is the stage when both couples have a clear notion of who their partner is, faults, foibles and weaknesses galore… yet they make a conscious choice to be with this person in spite of all of those things (and in some cases, because of those things). You are no longer with your partner because you need them, but because you’ve chosen them, which means the level of resentment you felt in the Power Struggle Phase has decreased, if not disappeared. If you’ve made it to this stage, you and your partner are a team. You genuinely love your partner, and you look out for their best interests just as much as you look out for your own. Your partner is your best friend. There are few surprises about your partner's habits or character in this phase. You’ve collaborated to overcome many challenges together, and have grown to accept and support each other without restriction. Your vision for your relationship is in congruence with who you are and what you both truly want. You have discussed your future together - you have similar life goals, and you feel encouraged to define your relationship further. Many couples decide to make a formal or public commitment to each other in this stage (such as marriage) to demonstrate their intention to continue their relationship. This is the stage in which your relationship becomes a true partnership.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
so what are you going for today?
butterflies in your stomach? romance?
or do you find someone who truly loves you?
i was once told, all it matters was how much you love me.
i guess no matter how long you date doesn't matter. wedding ceremonies doesn't matter as well.
what matters is, how long can you truly love somebody and hurdle through the many things in reality and creates a true relationship at the end of the day?
sometimes, i wonder where is the true value of a relationship which you have formed with somebody.
but well, love is blind as they say.
and change is as good as the end of a chapter or a death of a person.
everyone knows.
"why cherish people who doesn't cherish you?"
"what you've understood today, isn't what she does."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dear CPL Armour Technician Boy,
you better do what's right.
i've got all the fuck details i have of you.
take good care of your weak body.
i don't blame you for all the ugly situation and results we all have today.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Well, life's been busy.
Lessons have started.
Studies and career are my top priority.
Language studies are upcoming next, and so much so for playing of strings.
Good news for my investments.
Maturity are soon to come.
So does ORD.
Fitness are maintaining well. Running 5KM every now and then with my Doctor. Trying to clock between 15 ~20 minutes @ 5Km. i think it's good enough and running every other 2 days, toning at every other alternate days @ gym.
Otherwise, how to eat more nice and good food?!
Infusion for patients getting more and more skillful esp. after giving medical lessons for the special breed and more and more practice with the no. of patients and casualties from day to day.
shall focus and work hard and smart for the next 3 years.
life is short, live it well.
we don't have much time to lose.
keep learning, don't stop.
Cheers! =)
Tuesday, June 01, 2010
as per requested by my dear friends who loves to read on my perspectives on r/s, love etc.
since then, i'm thinking of revamping my whole blog or probably shift to a new one with animations n etc involve, maybe on lifestyles, fashion, food, and human relationships. who knows i may become a celebrity blogger? haha. dream dream. wait till i fully get my laptop fixed, and master dreamwaver with photoshop cs5.
my bro did, i don't believe i couldn't.
give me some time then.
i wanted to keep it simple, but well.. we should get complicated. or life is.. isn't it?
maybe i should ask myself why i should stop typing?
sorry for any tenses and etc for this entry. i kinda cant be bothered to type properly at sucha time.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
在你左右
你是否曾想过你最爱的人欺骗过你吗？
有些人能够很潇洒的拿起让后放下
有些人不管时间过了多久都会怀旧
今天的你属于了那一类型的人?
maybe like what my brother shared with me the other day... humans are never satisfied.
you have been there, always there. there are many little things which you may have done, the efforts, your sweat; your persistence brought you through time. people's lifestyle changes, perspective about many things changes.
things started to be taken for granted. i.e. for the little thing you brought, all your heart and soul was probably a token hoping that this little gift would be a charm to protect the dearest one you love. yet, you probably seen it chucked aside. disappointed?
i was kinda chatting with L, then i was mentioning about this bag of greenbeans which my grandma probably gave it to be while i was young. till today, it's still in my couple, power rangers pencil case, envelopes and etc. even say stickers, which i probably used a few, i would at least keep the last one just to remember that it was once grandma/aunt who brought me. today when i see it, i'll remember who has given me what, though the place/date that is probably not recorded.
many of us love to receive surprises, love and etc. immediately, we were touched by what's given to us. (we're all visual creatures) however, why not have the image that flashes in your mind; how has he go about doing so? how was his effort? how did he do it? even for the simplest thing that he has done, say packing meals and etc; have you thought about the long queue/waiting time, how he has travel just to deliver it to you?
i'm not trying to ask you to weigh or calculate love for all that you've given.
love is about appreciating, isn't it? sometimes or often than not, when it has been there, always there; every little thing was forgotten/not seen. we don't often remember the good little things such as the aforementioned. so i hope those who are in love, sees this.
we probably remember those impactful ones, hurtful ones, BIG surprise one.
you know when do man start to feel tired about r/s? when he/she has given all, but least feel appreciated at the end of the day. energizing man to do things for you is easy, but you got to get your language right.
有人说你越恨就是越爱.
weird huh? sometimes we're so blinded by hatred which was cause by another party that we actually forget how much we do actually love them.
could you ever recall how the soul that was joined so fully as one? the trust, the bond, the TRUE love that was built over time.
mind you, no one enters the stage of TRUE love till about 3-4 years and more. And, you'll experience, "fall in love" with your partner again. only then, it'll be even more beautiful. only when more hurdles are crossed, differences are brushed, only then it'll evolve, yet still knowing how to appreciate one another. otherwise, the first 3 years are probably still on discovering process, where lust and passion are still burning HOT.
when you first truly love someone, it isn't about his/her looks, it isn't about his/her talents or capability. you fell in love with his/her flaws which looks so beautiful to you.
you don't nor can you love someone ALOT everyday. you love someone a little more each day, and you love him/her more or less on different days. you'll always think about him/her irregardless of where you are; your concern and curiosity about him/her despite time & place.
what has your mind deny you of, today?
the day your wife die, only then she's called yours.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
S will hate me for the next part. but i'll only reflect the truth about reality.
when you're in love, you feel butterflies in your stomach, but words play the part.
when you never thought that there's an ending, we forgot that passion dies.
i believe actions through time speaks louder than words and even beliefs.
today if a girl were to leave her BF for me, she will do so once again.
however, women do love men to sweet-talk them. only then they feel they are loved.
yet, at the end, they are the ones who will hurt you most. sad, but it's a fact.
today, you may think why am i not entering one? i know my time hasn't come, i've got 8 years long to chose or even more.
when you enter one r/s, it isn't about trial an error, it isn't about filling your void. it's when you know you will love and care for that someone despite health and wealth, this life-time.
somehow, i made pretty much good girlfriends whom i can often chat with.. be it phone/sms/msn. And i mean i do really take them as FRIENDS and no other intentions.
love is a natural occurrence process. don't have to find nor look for it.
time is still early. you'll have the best to come. =)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
爱情是撒旦送来的礼物
拆开之后
你的人生就陷入万劫不复
爱情是毒菜穿的糖衣
甜美的包装不是致命的危机
爱情是残酷的游戏
当你好不容易鼓起勇气
付出真心的时候
再一次让你陷入失望的绝境
真心是笑话
勇气是废话
坚持是鬼话
忠贞是梦话
幸福是屁话
一生一世的相恋或许只是出现在言情小说里面的情节...
have i satisfy your appetite?
basic military talk is on episode 4 now. mine is probably 6/7... still a long way before the video surfaces. =.=
since then, i'm thinking of revamping my whole blog or probably shift to a new one with animations n etc involve, maybe on lifestyles, fashion, food, and human relationships. who knows i may become a celebrity blogger? haha. dream dream. wait till i fully get my laptop fixed, and master dreamwaver with photoshop cs5.
my bro did, i don't believe i couldn't.
give me some time then.
i wanted to keep it simple, but well.. we should get complicated. or life is.. isn't it?
maybe i should ask myself why i should stop typing?
sorry for any tenses and etc for this entry. i kinda cant be bothered to type properly at sucha time.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
在你左右
你是否曾想过你最爱的人欺骗过你吗？
有些人能够很潇洒的拿起让后放下
有些人不管时间过了多久都会怀旧
今天的你属于了那一类型的人?
maybe like what my brother shared with me the other day... humans are never satisfied.
you have been there, always there. there are many little things which you may have done, the efforts, your sweat; your persistence brought you through time. people's lifestyle changes, perspective about many things changes.
things started to be taken for granted. i.e. for the little thing you brought, all your heart and soul was probably a token hoping that this little gift would be a charm to protect the dearest one you love. yet, you probably seen it chucked aside. disappointed?
i was kinda chatting with L, then i was mentioning about this bag of greenbeans which my grandma probably gave it to be while i was young. till today, it's still in my couple, power rangers pencil case, envelopes and etc. even say stickers, which i probably used a few, i would at least keep the last one just to remember that it was once grandma/aunt who brought me. today when i see it, i'll remember who has given me what, though the place/date that is probably not recorded.
many of us love to receive surprises, love and etc. immediately, we were touched by what's given to us. (we're all visual creatures) however, why not have the image that flashes in your mind; how has he go about doing so? how was his effort? how did he do it? even for the simplest thing that he has done, say packing meals and etc; have you thought about the long queue/waiting time, how he has travel just to deliver it to you?
i'm not trying to ask you to weigh or calculate love for all that you've given.
love is about appreciating, isn't it? sometimes or often than not, when it has been there, always there; every little thing was forgotten/not seen. we don't often remember the good little things such as the aforementioned. so i hope those who are in love, sees this.
we probably remember those impactful ones, hurtful ones, BIG surprise one.
you know when do man start to feel tired about r/s? when he/she has given all, but least feel appreciated at the end of the day. energizing man to do things for you is easy, but you got to get your language right.
有人说你越恨就是越爱.
weird huh? sometimes we're so blinded by hatred which was cause by another party that we actually forget how much we do actually love them.
could you ever recall how the soul that was joined so fully as one? the trust, the bond, the TRUE love that was built over time.
mind you, no one enters the stage of TRUE love till about 3-4 years and more. And, you'll experience, "fall in love" with your partner again. only then, it'll be even more beautiful. only when more hurdles are crossed, differences are brushed, only then it'll evolve, yet still knowing how to appreciate one another. otherwise, the first 3 years are probably still on discovering process, where lust and passion are still burning HOT.
when you first truly love someone, it isn't about his/her looks, it isn't about his/her talents or capability. you fell in love with his/her flaws which looks so beautiful to you.
you don't nor can you love someone ALOT everyday. you love someone a little more each day, and you love him/her more or less on different days. you'll always think about him/her irregardless of where you are; your concern and curiosity about him/her despite time & place.
what has your mind deny you of, today?
the day your wife die, only then she's called yours.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
S will hate me for the next part. but i'll only reflect the truth about reality.
when you're in love, you feel butterflies in your stomach, but words play the part.
when you never thought that there's an ending, we forgot that passion dies.
i believe actions through time speaks louder than words and even beliefs.
today if a girl were to leave her BF for me, she will do so once again.
however, women do love men to sweet-talk them. only then they feel they are loved.
yet, at the end, they are the ones who will hurt you most. sad, but it's a fact.
today, you may think why am i not entering one? i know my time hasn't come, i've got 8 years long to chose or even more.
when you enter one r/s, it isn't about trial an error, it isn't about filling your void. it's when you know you will love and care for that someone despite health and wealth, this life-time.
somehow, i made pretty much good girlfriends whom i can often chat with.. be it phone/sms/msn. And i mean i do really take them as FRIENDS and no other intentions.
love is a natural occurrence process. don't have to find nor look for it.
time is still early. you'll have the best to come. =)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
爱情是撒旦送来的礼物
拆开之后
你的人生就陷入万劫不复
爱情是毒菜穿的糖衣
甜美的包装不是致命的危机
爱情是残酷的游戏
当你好不容易鼓起勇气
付出真心的时候
再一次让你陷入失望的绝境
真心是笑话
勇气是废话
坚持是鬼话
忠贞是梦话
幸福是屁话
一生一世的相恋或许只是出现在言情小说里面的情节...
have i satisfy your appetite?
basic military talk is on episode 4 now. mine is probably 6/7... still a long way before the video surfaces. =.=
Friday, May 28, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Wednesday, March 03, 2010
truth & lies/ expectations vs habits.
somehow these few days, few or rather 2 women happen to "su ku" to me.
C was telling me over the phone how selfish she probably feel her boy is, probably to a point where the man say, he couldn't breathe. yet, she ain't restricting him from doing anything. i pondered about mine then...
"he didn't understand what love is", it's about compromising & accomodating.
so i thought about dates which i had, which probably mid-way... snapped and we got to leave the restaurant for some other purposes.
so she talks about her little family issues and linking to why can't the man understand.
man are no doubt childish to a certain extend in r/s. it's dependent on what ways and how. some may feel comfortable, doing a little childish things to probably make the r/s fun and doing this in inappropriate times probably irritates the women. some men can be childish as bringing up petty issues and quarrels.
let's not be sexist and take what a man should do or what a women should do. because, whatever that's done should be coming naturally from the heart. no expectations. we're all humans ain't we?
we have mood swings and that's what a r/s is for, to be there for one another. have you ever feel when you're single and when you have a mood swing, all that you could probably be moody towards to, is just yourself?
had a chat with a NSmen who's 27. heard stories about his life. so talking about his r/s... he was dumped and patched when he was serving his NS. no doubt was the lady who cheated though. he loses faith in r/s, thereafter going one after another. currently he has one for 3 years.
out of curiosity, i ask... have you ever been honest about your past?
he said, "no".
for the past 3 years, there wasn't any honesty. yet he said he regretted going on with so many flings just for the feeling of company. and he told me, sometimes your maturity comes later. and sometimes after sometime in life, then you start to regret some of the decisions you actually made.
i realized, sometimes i think too far. yet, probably some people don't.
sometimes i wonder, in your life, you're faced with putting on a mask daily. yet, when supposedly love is what you think about is innocent, you're actually blinded by the lies that lie behind.
so from the conversation, i made an observation in comparison to mine, or rather perhaps it's an common case...
your girl just finished her lessons, she expects you to pick her up.
he said he was tired, so he didn't say he was tired. he said that he's not free and needs to work overtime.
so we did conclude, if we were to say i'm tired... she'll take it as you're lazy to pick her up etc etc etc. at that moment, we just couldn't give that little love and understanding.
sometimes, expectations becomes a habit. and till the day when you gotta really lose that habit, your expectations became your desperation of wanting that habit back.
when we were all young and innocent, we know what we want. yet, as we grew older we forgot what we want.
sometimes, we do not have time to lose. we'll never know what's gonna happen the very next day if we never know how to cherish the one we love.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
anyway, i was informed by C that L had shown mindef lady on the episode i filmed. the comment given was, i was really good looking. =.=
i wonder if it's aunty who said that, because it's usually the aunties who comment about me.
i think the video gonna be up soon? till then, i guess i'll be expecting many critizism...
somehow these few days, few or rather 2 women happen to "su ku" to me.
C was telling me over the phone how selfish she probably feel her boy is, probably to a point where the man say, he couldn't breathe. yet, she ain't restricting him from doing anything. i pondered about mine then...
"he didn't understand what love is", it's about compromising & accomodating.
so i thought about dates which i had, which probably mid-way... snapped and we got to leave the restaurant for some other purposes.
so she talks about her little family issues and linking to why can't the man understand.
man are no doubt childish to a certain extend in r/s. it's dependent on what ways and how. some may feel comfortable, doing a little childish things to probably make the r/s fun and doing this in inappropriate times probably irritates the women. some men can be childish as bringing up petty issues and quarrels.
let's not be sexist and take what a man should do or what a women should do. because, whatever that's done should be coming naturally from the heart. no expectations. we're all humans ain't we?
we have mood swings and that's what a r/s is for, to be there for one another. have you ever feel when you're single and when you have a mood swing, all that you could probably be moody towards to, is just yourself?
had a chat with a NSmen who's 27. heard stories about his life. so talking about his r/s... he was dumped and patched when he was serving his NS. no doubt was the lady who cheated though. he loses faith in r/s, thereafter going one after another. currently he has one for 3 years.
out of curiosity, i ask... have you ever been honest about your past?
he said, "no".
for the past 3 years, there wasn't any honesty. yet he said he regretted going on with so many flings just for the feeling of company. and he told me, sometimes your maturity comes later. and sometimes after sometime in life, then you start to regret some of the decisions you actually made.
i realized, sometimes i think too far. yet, probably some people don't.
sometimes i wonder, in your life, you're faced with putting on a mask daily. yet, when supposedly love is what you think about is innocent, you're actually blinded by the lies that lie behind.
so from the conversation, i made an observation in comparison to mine, or rather perhaps it's an common case...
your girl just finished her lessons, she expects you to pick her up.
he said he was tired, so he didn't say he was tired. he said that he's not free and needs to work overtime.
so we did conclude, if we were to say i'm tired... she'll take it as you're lazy to pick her up etc etc etc. at that moment, we just couldn't give that little love and understanding.
sometimes, expectations becomes a habit. and till the day when you gotta really lose that habit, your expectations became your desperation of wanting that habit back.
when we were all young and innocent, we know what we want. yet, as we grew older we forgot what we want.
sometimes, we do not have time to lose. we'll never know what's gonna happen the very next day if we never know how to cherish the one we love.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
anyway, i was informed by C that L had shown mindef lady on the episode i filmed. the comment given was, i was really good looking. =.=
i wonder if it's aunty who said that, because it's usually the aunties who comment about me.
i think the video gonna be up soon? till then, i guess i'll be expecting many critizism...
Sunday, February 28, 2010
hot summer days.
we've complicate love ourselves?
we did, making rounds, making turns.
reality sets in over time and we forgot about the simplicity of hugs, kisses and love; someone whom you could connect with.
he wants simple, she wants simple. yet, we think in complexity in a different frequency.
sometimes, we're all waiting for the TIME.
sometimes, we do not know when the deadline will come.
OPPOSITE SEX.
thinking, words are always on a contradictory.
mind and heart ain't connecting. the sexes ain't connecting as well.
however, love isn't perfect. it's hurtful, it's everything you've got to risk.
it's cracked up into pieces, but yet you can always piece it back without realizing it.
today, what's with us?
i could decipher, i could guide others fairly well.
yet, i couldn't get mine right.
we've complicate love ourselves?
we did, making rounds, making turns.
reality sets in over time and we forgot about the simplicity of hugs, kisses and love; someone whom you could connect with.
he wants simple, she wants simple. yet, we think in complexity in a different frequency.
sometimes, we're all waiting for the TIME.
sometimes, we do not know when the deadline will come.
OPPOSITE SEX.
thinking, words are always on a contradictory.
mind and heart ain't connecting. the sexes ain't connecting as well.
however, love isn't perfect. it's hurtful, it's everything you've got to risk.
it's cracked up into pieces, but yet you can always piece it back without realizing it.
today, what's with us?
i could decipher, i could guide others fairly well.
yet, i couldn't get mine right.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
简单
finished "海派甜心".
其实爱可以很简单. 不是吗?
或许, 现实上是个不可能的梦.
anyway, i do not why i'm into drama recently. especially i didn't expect myself to watch 海派甜心 after 下一站, 幸福.
in the 1st place, i didn't like the image of Luo Zhi Xiang and the act cute Yang Chen Ling and the so called Taiwan idol drama. perhaps, out of curiosity... like why so many people are into the show？
then i realized, it's actually quite good.
the start was funny, subsequently there were quite a no. of touching scene at the back. short & sweet, total of 14 episode.
下一站, 幸福 not much like a common Taiwan idol series. many emotional scene, many good sentences to ponder about... but maybe a little draggy. and if you probably "chiong" one shot, you can get ready a few tissue box.
now became one of those whose addicted to the song "雨爱".
=.=
and every story has it's meaning.. i mean i do not know how to pen it all down at one shot about how i feel towards certain things which i've watched. perhaps when i come across again, then some cross referencing.
finished "海派甜心".
其实爱可以很简单. 不是吗?
或许, 现实上是个不可能的梦.
anyway, i do not why i'm into drama recently. especially i didn't expect myself to watch 海派甜心 after 下一站, 幸福.
in the 1st place, i didn't like the image of Luo Zhi Xiang and the act cute Yang Chen Ling and the so called Taiwan idol drama. perhaps, out of curiosity... like why so many people are into the show？
then i realized, it's actually quite good.
the start was funny, subsequently there were quite a no. of touching scene at the back. short & sweet, total of 14 episode.
下一站, 幸福 not much like a common Taiwan idol series. many emotional scene, many good sentences to ponder about... but maybe a little draggy. and if you probably "chiong" one shot, you can get ready a few tissue box.
now became one of those whose addicted to the song "雨爱".
=.=
and every story has it's meaning.. i mean i do not know how to pen it all down at one shot about how i feel towards certain things which i've watched. perhaps when i come across again, then some cross referencing.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
suppressed uncertainties
no doubt, it was all the jealousy.
no doubt, it was all the disappointments.
leading to mistrust, fear.
bursted.
i was just being myself.
if every woman needs to be respected, then...
every man has their pride.
baby, sorry.
当你爱一个人
你会担心
你会在乎
你会关心
你会因为他而烦
你会因为他而生气
你会因为他而伤心
只有他.
superb tired today. x.X
no doubt, it was all the jealousy.
no doubt, it was all the disappointments.
leading to mistrust, fear.
bursted.
i was just being myself.
if every woman needs to be respected, then...
every man has their pride.
baby, sorry.
当你爱一个人
你会担心
你会在乎
你会关心
你会因为他而烦
你会因为他而生气
你会因为他而伤心
只有他.
superb tired today. x.X
Sunday, February 21, 2010
担心
mid way of "海派甜心". not bad, it's funny and a little touching. still, i think "下一站, 幸福" is better.
one of the episode got me recall the time when i was really worried, i kept calling but no one picked up. ended up, she was hospitalized due to accident. as i watch, i laughed to myself...
had some conversation with P. i guess i've became a r/s consultant.
many a times, as time pass by, we forgot how or what make us admire and appreciate our spouse very well. no doubt, the love hormones are kicking in place, and when you hit the sweetest part of your r/s, that's where the hormones are drained concurrently as well. when it ended or when you feel like ending it, you probably couldn't understand why you feel that way.
overtime, flaws get magnified and something which you probably start to feel irritated by. as said, everyone has to understand the evolution of a r/s, stagnancy is a natural process which you need to accept, and it requires consistent effort.
each r/s when you end, somehow or another you feel the regrets later and probably out of guilt for the promises which you once made and failed to fulfill. it's something which you probably can't hide.
a long term r/s is sth a couple should be proud of, because it's love through time.
yet, somehow i do not how to untie mine.
as i observe and listen,
其实初恋是最珍贵的. 因为他的开始是当我们的心最纯真的时刻. 尤其是他教了你如何去爱一个人.
有很多人往往进入了下一段感情的时候, 往往还是忘不了. 而选择了离开, 到了最后还是后了悔.
我爱听你对我唱着歌的声音
我爱在焰火下与你相吻的瞬间
我爱你与我吃最爱口味冰欺凌的感觉
当你每晚入眠时, 想起的会是他
当你一睡醒时, 想念在你床边的人会是他
在白天的时候偶尔也会想起.. 他.
其实一切都因为爱还存在...
mid way of "海派甜心". not bad, it's funny and a little touching. still, i think "下一站, 幸福" is better.
one of the episode got me recall the time when i was really worried, i kept calling but no one picked up. ended up, she was hospitalized due to accident. as i watch, i laughed to myself...
had some conversation with P. i guess i've became a r/s consultant.
many a times, as time pass by, we forgot how or what make us admire and appreciate our spouse very well. no doubt, the love hormones are kicking in place, and when you hit the sweetest part of your r/s, that's where the hormones are drained concurrently as well. when it ended or when you feel like ending it, you probably couldn't understand why you feel that way.
overtime, flaws get magnified and something which you probably start to feel irritated by. as said, everyone has to understand the evolution of a r/s, stagnancy is a natural process which you need to accept, and it requires consistent effort.
each r/s when you end, somehow or another you feel the regrets later and probably out of guilt for the promises which you once made and failed to fulfill. it's something which you probably can't hide.
a long term r/s is sth a couple should be proud of, because it's love through time.
yet, somehow i do not how to untie mine.
as i observe and listen,
其实初恋是最珍贵的. 因为他的开始是当我们的心最纯真的时刻. 尤其是他教了你如何去爱一个人.
有很多人往往进入了下一段感情的时候, 往往还是忘不了. 而选择了离开, 到了最后还是后了悔.
我爱听你对我唱着歌的声音
我爱在焰火下与你相吻的瞬间
我爱你与我吃最爱口味冰欺凌的感觉
当你每晚入眠时, 想起的会是他
当你一睡醒时, 想念在你床边的人会是他
在白天的时候偶尔也会想起.. 他.
其实一切都因为爱还存在...
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
busy.
cny has been pretty packed up this year. had been the "duty driver" for my family the past few days, rushing from places to places. it's indeed very tiring. each day i'm home abt 3-4am, and waking up at 9 plus 10, dozing off at relative's place from time to time.
cny brief.
rental was made the very last min. and shockingly, i got a manual car. i cursed and swear to my buddy, because it was so last minute then i knew that it was manual. nevertheless, i've got to make do with it and adapt to changes.
the start got my palms all sweaty. engine got stalled at traffic lights like 2-3 times, reverse gear can't be pulled in because there's this gear 6, and you got to lift up the safety catch to go into reverse. all these happened on my way home.
so i practiced a few rounds down my block and get myself familiarize. later in the evening after reunion dinner, sent grandpa and aunty home successfully without any issues.
now i'm HOOKED to driving manual if i'm NOT tired & NO jams. it's NOT fun holding to half clutch during jams.
anyway had quite a bit of black jack fun at JK's house on CNY 1st day, all the way at CCK till late. i had like 5-6x blackjack. i was even interviewed by JK's mum and aunties. =.=... like they seriously need a son-in-law or sth. they even questioned JK why never introduce me to her sister who's like 22 going 23. n yea, JK is my man, younger than me, 18/19 i think.
2nd day rushed through the visiting, and some walking with family. therefore celebrate J's bday at K with the rest. played blackjack as well, but lost this time.
3rd day, which is today. had some fun with texas poker and a little blackjack. got me recovered abit. phew. and now, just came back from some chill out. in 4 hrs time, i'll be in for work then. seems like the highlights are gambling.
shagged.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
the fall.
P asked me, if she had a fall how would you response?
i replied, "i would ask how she had her fall? where she injured herself? and how serious is it? after meeting her, i would ask how or take a look at how it was, help her rub, or give a kiss on her wounds."
she replied, "i got nothing out of all these. only dots from his text message. and he took sometime to actually ask me how it was after the dots"
she told me she felt very disappointed.
and i wonder if i can been too caring? O.o
and so i told her, don't compare me to your partner. i mean, if you compare, all you face would all be disappointments. so why disappoint yourself?
i mean if you love somebody, you would lover his/her everything. actually, it's irregardless of how he/she treats you.
and on his part, he's probably looking at his wild cards. does this mean this r/s is facing a danger? probably since it has been 2-3 years. passion seems to be diminishing. and yeah, a guy could probably love a lady for 3-4 years at max.
what happens if he still loves you after that time frame? does that exceed the meaning of true love?
it seems like it's always the case where, the more you love, the more he/she will leave. the harder he/she is able to get, the more you love. when you got ditched, you probably dying to have him/her back. when the dying part stops, then probably out of the blue, he/she wants you back.
don't judge how much you can love somebody. the amt of love holds no boundaries. don't weigh love with reality, you'll never be able to feel it. love can't be kept consistent, amt is undefined at everyday, every part of your life.
it's just about, as long as you still love him/her and you hope to have him/her in you life , walking the journey isn't it?
why complicate the word L-O-V-E?
i don't know what's holding me back.
maybe, i'm afraid.
cny has been pretty packed up this year. had been the "duty driver" for my family the past few days, rushing from places to places. it's indeed very tiring. each day i'm home abt 3-4am, and waking up at 9 plus 10, dozing off at relative's place from time to time.
cny brief.
rental was made the very last min. and shockingly, i got a manual car. i cursed and swear to my buddy, because it was so last minute then i knew that it was manual. nevertheless, i've got to make do with it and adapt to changes.
the start got my palms all sweaty. engine got stalled at traffic lights like 2-3 times, reverse gear can't be pulled in because there's this gear 6, and you got to lift up the safety catch to go into reverse. all these happened on my way home.
so i practiced a few rounds down my block and get myself familiarize. later in the evening after reunion dinner, sent grandpa and aunty home successfully without any issues.
now i'm HOOKED to driving manual if i'm NOT tired & NO jams. it's NOT fun holding to half clutch during jams.
anyway had quite a bit of black jack fun at JK's house on CNY 1st day, all the way at CCK till late. i had like 5-6x blackjack. i was even interviewed by JK's mum and aunties. =.=... like they seriously need a son-in-law or sth. they even questioned JK why never introduce me to her sister who's like 22 going 23. n yea, JK is my man, younger than me, 18/19 i think.
2nd day rushed through the visiting, and some walking with family. therefore celebrate J's bday at K with the rest. played blackjack as well, but lost this time.
3rd day, which is today. had some fun with texas poker and a little blackjack. got me recovered abit. phew. and now, just came back from some chill out. in 4 hrs time, i'll be in for work then. seems like the highlights are gambling.
shagged.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
the fall.
P asked me, if she had a fall how would you response?
i replied, "i would ask how she had her fall? where she injured herself? and how serious is it? after meeting her, i would ask how or take a look at how it was, help her rub, or give a kiss on her wounds."
she replied, "i got nothing out of all these. only dots from his text message. and he took sometime to actually ask me how it was after the dots"
she told me she felt very disappointed.
and i wonder if i can been too caring? O.o
and so i told her, don't compare me to your partner. i mean, if you compare, all you face would all be disappointments. so why disappoint yourself?
i mean if you love somebody, you would lover his/her everything. actually, it's irregardless of how he/she treats you.
and on his part, he's probably looking at his wild cards. does this mean this r/s is facing a danger? probably since it has been 2-3 years. passion seems to be diminishing. and yeah, a guy could probably love a lady for 3-4 years at max.
what happens if he still loves you after that time frame? does that exceed the meaning of true love?
it seems like it's always the case where, the more you love, the more he/she will leave. the harder he/she is able to get, the more you love. when you got ditched, you probably dying to have him/her back. when the dying part stops, then probably out of the blue, he/she wants you back.
don't judge how much you can love somebody. the amt of love holds no boundaries. don't weigh love with reality, you'll never be able to feel it. love can't be kept consistent, amt is undefined at everyday, every part of your life.
it's just about, as long as you still love him/her and you hope to have him/her in you life , walking the journey isn't it?
why complicate the word L-O-V-E?
i don't know what's holding me back.
maybe, i'm afraid.
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